A boy in the hand
by dogbertcarroll
Summary: A lonely young girl takes her Poppa’s advice on the best way to snag a boyfriend. Too bad her Haruka Poppa had just been kidding around. Ranma & Sailor Moon crossover.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Suing a fanfic author is like masturbating with sandpaper; there may be a bit of satisfaction in it, but in the end it's just too irritating to bother with. I claim **nothing**. I'm so broke suing me would actually improve my financial situation.

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**Not as Hentai as it sounds**

Haruka stormed into the house, irritation rolling off her in waves, as she slammed her racing gloves down on the coffee table. "I can't believe the nerve of that man."

"The nerve of who, love?" Michiru asked, as she pulled the young blond into a warm embrace that quickly diffused most of her anger.

"One of the mechanics voiced the opinion that I was too butch to be a real women and that the only way I'd ever get a man was by trapping him." Haruka growled out the last bit, angry at some grease monkey for insulting her femininity, despite her complete lack of interest in catching a man.

"You know what? I can actually see you doing that." Michiru responded evenly, a glint of mischief in her eyes.

"What? Not you too!" Haruka replied, pulling back from her lover.

"Well he does have a point." Michiru said struggling to keep a straight face. "I can just picture you building an elaborate trap and lurking in the bushes, wearing camouflage, waiting for some poor hapless male to arrive so you could net him."

Haruka's frown broke as she began to snicker, before breaking out in a full fledged belly laugh and throwing herself down on the couch. "Well you have to admit it'd be a lot more effective then the Inners various attempts to snare one. "

"I know." Michiru agreed with her girlfriend. "I don't know why Makoto has such trouble though. She cooks a mean bento and they say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

Haruka snorted "Try aiming a little further south. She'd have better luck if she tried a G-String and pasties along with the food. Trust me on this. I know guys and the only way you can get to their heart through their stomach is with a chainsaw."

Michiru gave a soundless mew of distaste, before responding. " And what would you do with a guy anyway?"

"Oh, I can think of a few things." Haruka said with a leer that shocked Michiru.

"For instance…" Michiru trailed off, not sure she wanted to open this unexpected can of worms.

"Landscaping and vehicle maintenance." Haruka fired back with a smirk, mentally tallying herself a point in retribution for her lover's earlier comment.

"But Haruka-Poppa," Hotaru spoke up, reminding them she was in the room "You do all the vehicle maintenance for us."

"She also trims bushes like a pro." Michiru murmured with a small grin.

"Then I guess we don't need a man around here, do we?" Haruka said.

"Not unless Setsuna or Hotaru bring one home." Michiru replied as she snuggled up to her girlfriend on the couch.

Hotaru perked up at her Michiru's comment . 'I'm allowed to date?'

The possibility of a friend drew her in more then the romantic aspect. From what she had overheard from the girls in her class, it was like having a best friend who would hug you at odd moments.

This had possibilities…

Hotaru went off to play, leaving her adopted parents to discuss the finer points of… gardening.

'Who knew they were so concerned about lawn care?' Hotaru thought, as she headed to the library to do a little research on several of the things that Haruka had mentioned.

Hotaru phoned her order into the Cat Café from a nearby payphone and began working on her trap. She'd gotten a book on 'live catch' traps from the library and the chapter on snares had caught her eye. All she'd needed was some rope and Haruka-poppa had 50' of silk rope in the garage for some reason. She'd never seen her guardian's using it, so she was sure they wouldn't mind her borrowing it. She was halfway done with her trap when her order arrived.

"What trap for?" Shampoo asked curiously.

Startled, Hotaru let go of the rope and watched sadly as the tree sprung back up, tangling her line in the upper limbs. It had taken her half an hour and most of her energy to get the small tree tied and bent the way she wanted it.

"Well, Momma and Poppa decided I was old enough to start dating, so I'm setting a trap to catch a boyfriend." She answered distractedly, wondering how long it was going to take to untangle the rope and get everything set up again.

Shampoo smiled fondly, remembering her own village's version of the Sadie Hawkin's dance idea. "Shampoo know how you feel. Shampoo remembers building trap to catch boyfriend when was your age. Only problem was, Shampoo catch Mousse."

Hotaru frowned cutely. "I really don't want to catch a Moose."

Shampoo nodded. "Shampoo _really_ know how you feel. Shampoo not want to catch Mousse either."

The amazon maiden looked pensive for a moment before grinning. "Let Shampoo help with trap. Then she lure off Mousse so you no get inflict… infect… No get stupid Mousse following you around all the time."

* * *

**5 Minutes later…**

"Good quality steel important. No want weak boyfriend and strong one easily break through anything not as strong." Shampoo thumped a metal bar with her hand making it ring.

**10 Minutes later…**

"And if use Acetylene torch like so, weld come out nice and even." She gestured to the seam she was working on, while the young girl watched fascinated.

**15 Minutes later…**

"And one final touch." Shampoo connected a heavy power line to the cage and hoisted it into the tree top. "And viola we done!"

Hotaru clapped her hands happily and gave a small cheer, before removing her welding goggles. "Thank you, Shampoo. I'm sure to catch a boyfriend now."

Shampoo grinned at her. "Now all need is bait."

The multi-talented warrior started to quickly sort her 'special' ramen from the young girl's order, but paused in thought. It wasn't like the laced ramen was likely to work on Ranma. He was really resistant to most mind altering techniques, which was part of the reason Shampoo kept using them on him.

The last thing she wanted was for an unscrupulous rival from her village to steal him away from her with some special herb or item, rare though they were, even inside the village.

'Best up dosage on next one and get grandma to teach Airen beginning mind block techniques.' Grinning Shampoo placed her 'special' on top of the little girl's order.

"Remember, must speak forcefully on what want to boy when catch. That way he know how behave. Now Shampoo lure off Mousse. It be just like him, show up and ruin all Shampoo's hard work." The amazon quickly sprang on to her bike yelling something about Airen that had a group of people chasing her before she'd gotten out of the park.

Hotaru watched curiously as martial artists seemed to appear out of nowhere and join in the chase.

'It's times like this that I wonder if being a reborn princess from a magical kingdom is really all that strange around here.'

Shrugging to herself the young girl quickly hid in the bushes as she noticed someone approaching, sniffing the air.


	2. Chapter 2

**An Appetite for Destruction**

Hotaru watched from the bushes as a pigtailed boy, wearing Chinese tongs, circled the bait.

He'd sniff the air and look at the picnic of Chinese food longingly, before scanning the surroundings and circling a bit closer once more. It was only a matter of time until he fell for her trap.

* * *

Ranma knew it was a trap. Even he wasn't dense enough to believe a load of Chinese takeout from the Cat Café would popup with a sign reading 'Free Food' for no reason, but Shampoo had already cycled off, drawing the entire Nerima circus with her.

It was possible that Shampoo had planned to trap him, but the rest of the NWC had ruined it, so she was leading them on a wild goose chase to get back at them.

_The entire NWC (and in fact a good portion of Nerima) would gather in Juuban on the second Wednesday of every month for Jedite's Big Building Material Sale. _

_Jedite's Building Emporium sold most of its stock to Nerima, but found it was much better not to lease the store out of there, for safety and insurance reasons. _

_Juuban was a much better site. The Senshi caused just enough damage to keep a steady flow of business coming Jedite's way and allowed him to make his real profits at the Wednesday sale by wholesaling lumber and cement to the Nerima ward. _

All of this ran through Ranma's mind as he considered the free buffet in front of him. Nabiki had been working overtime to pound some basic economics into his head and against all odds some of it had stuck.

If the trap was already sprung the food was safe and from the looks of things…

Ranma paused and scanned his surroundings once more. All his fiancées and rivals were off chasing Shampoo, so it should be safe.

Ranma's stomach growled loudly, scaring birds from the nearby trees.

Ranma chuckled, embarrassed and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I'm glad no one was around to hear that."

Hotaru stifled a giggle, as she watched the boy circle the food again. He moved just like a big cat and he was really cute! All she had to do was wait until he sat down and relaxed a bit and he would be all hers. Shampoo had warned her that boys could move really quickly when startled so it was best to wait until he'd already eaten a bit and relaxed his guard.

Ranma crouched down at the edge of the blanket and carefully poked the 'Free Food' sign with a stick. When the sign fell over without triggering anything he began to relax a little.

'No glomps or blind duck boys. Must be my lucky day.'

Hotaru watched as her prey (or as she was already calling him mentally 'Mine!'), devoured the Ramen, Shampoo had placed on top of the takeout boxes.

He ate just like Usagi did, which everyone thought was funny, even if Rei did complain about it for some reason. She'd asked Papa-Haruka about it and she'd just mumbled something about denial and said she'd explain when she was older.

The purple eyed girl grinned as she triggered the trap.

Ranma felt strangely relaxed after eating the Ramen and even the electrified steel cage that clanged down around him, trapping him with the food, couldn't dent it. He'd half expected something like this to happen anyway. The dark haired little girl with the huge grin was new though.

Ranma smiled back at the grinning girl. It was always a nice surprise to find someone happy to see him. Plus the girl looked much too young to be considering stripping him and tying him to a bed, like Kodachi had tried yesterday.

Hotaru blushed. He looked really handsome when he smiled. The Inners were going to be so jealous.

"I caught you fair and square, so now you're my boyfriend!" The young girl stated proudly.

Ranma nodded. It made perfect sense to him. If he could end up married by beating a girl in hand to hand combat then becoming a boyfriend by being trapped wasn't that hard to believe. It'd certainly explain Kodachi's claims and dating style.

"What exactly does a boyfriend do?" The pigtailed teen asked curiously. He'd talked to Kasumi about the differences between boyfriends and fiancés once, but before he'd managed to get past the fact that you could stop being a boyfriend without anyone trying to kill you or make you commit seppuku, he'd been malleted by Akane for 'flirting' with her sister.

Hotaru froze for a moment before remembering what Shampoo had said abought having to be firm, so whatever boy she'd caught would know how to be a proper boyfriend. She'd planned on making a list of do's and don't along with a quick summary of what his duties were, but he'd shown up before she'd gotten very far. 'I wish Ami were here. She'd have a list written up and ready before you could blink! I guess I'll have to make something up.'

"The first and most important rule is that a boyfriend has to be a friend." The dark haired girl said, while pacing back and forth in front of the cage.

"Friend, got it." Ranma responded, writing it down in a little notebook.

"And he has to protect me from bullies." She paused. What all did Mamoru do for Usagi?

"Protect from bullies." Ranma grinned. This was right up his alley.

"And play with me." Wasn't Haruka papa always saying that playtime was a very important part of any serious relationship?

"Play with girlfriend. Check." It'd be nice to have someone to play games with.

The last time he'd played Monopoly, Ryoga had somehow gotten lost and ended up in England (They still weren't sure how he'd managed that, he'd only rolled a three!) Nabiki had claimed all of Ryoga's property and blackmailed Ranma into not charging her rent for the whole game, Kodachi had switched boards (Ranma hadn't even known there was a Kuno edition) and whatever card set it had for Chance had caused Akane to smack him in the head and call him a pervert. The resulting free-for-all had caused Soun to ban game-night at the Tendo residence.

"He has to compliment me and cheer me up when I'm sad."

Ranma carefully wrote it down, before frowning and speaking up. "I'll need help with that one. Every time I've complimented someone they've either gotten embarrassed or mad."

Hotaru grinned. "Haruka-papa has the same problem, but Michiru-mama's managed to help her keep it down to one major foot in mouth incident per week. I can get tips from her on how to help you."

"Being your boyfriend is just getting better and better."

This senshi of destruction blushed cutely and stared at her feet.

"Ok, what else?" Ranma asked.

"You have to take me places, like the movies." Hotaru racked her brain for places Mamoru took Usagi.

"What kind of movies?" The pigtailed boy asked suspiciously.

The movies, Akane had made him take her to were sappy love stories that he never figured out the plot to. The movies, Shampoo had drug him to were subtitled, but had some decent action. The movies, Ukyou would sneak off with him to see were pretty good, lots of action and explosions. Kodachi had managed to drag his paralyzed form to one movie. He'd almost died of blood loss and had refused to leave kasumi alone with any repairman or delivery guys since then.

"Well…" Hotaru began nervously, "the new Naruto movie is playing at the theater near my house."

"Naruto?!" Ranma perked up.

Pops hadn't let him watch cartoons when he was a kid, so he'd been making up for lost time since he got to the Tendo's. Fortunately Kasumi was a cartoon addict and had introduced him to dozens she'd thought he'd like. Ranma had claimed he was working on new techniques when Genma had bugged him about it and after the Kamehameha incident no one dared interrupt Ranma and Kasumi's cartoon time, even when they were watching the Care Bears. Ranma's evil grin and Kasumi's hysterical giggles about the 'Care Bear Stare' caused many shivers.

Naruto was one of Ranma's current favorites, even if the whole chakra thing was driving him nuts as he tried to figure it out. He'd managed to figure out several techniques from the show, but the trickier ones always went wrong somehow.

He thought briefly of the Shadow Clone jutsu, before quickly burying it in the back of his mind once more. Some things were just _too_ disturbing.

Hotaru barely had time to blink before finding herself sitting inside the cage with Ranma handing her a plate full of food.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN:** Had enough people asking for the next chapter that I decided to post it before I had a beta run through it. If you notice any errors send me a PM and I'll see about fixing them. Remember to review, it encourages me to write more.

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**Cartoons, Curses, and Conversations.**

Hotaru watched in amazement as Ranma's hands blurred into action, packing the empty Chinese food containers into smaller and smaller containers until finally he had a small square box that he slid into his pocket, where upon it vanished completely, leaving not the slightest lump in his pants to show that it existed.

He casually popped open the cage door with his palm, like it wasn't carrying 50,000 volts of current, brushed his pants off and offered Hotaru a hand up. " So, how about showing me the local movie theater?"

Ranma had some manners, you couldn't live in the same house with Kasumi Tendo and remain a complete barbarian (although Genma was trying, but even he found himself brushing grass out of his fur before coming inside) it was just that showing politeness to any of the fiancées in anything but an emergency usually caused an emergency, as the fiancées felt their own positions were threatened and started declaring war on each other.

Hotaru eagerly accepted the hand up and even though she turned bright red from the contact, she showed no sign of letting go anytime soon, as she led him through the park.

Ranma, being the sophisticated ladies man that he was, decided that the reason she was so red and wouldn't let go of his hand was because the food was too spicy and since she was a bit fragile (i.e. couldn't use rebar as twist-ties) he'd better put an arm around her to help steady her in case she started to faint.

Ranma was sure he'd done the right thing when she slid an arm around his waist and leaned into him. The fiancées had conditioned him into believing that asking why a girl' s face was red led to being clobbered, so he'd been trying to figure out what he was supposed to do for quite some time.

'They must not like being weak for a moment being pointed out.'

Happy that he'd figured it out, he made a mental note of it. 'When girlfriend is feeling a bit weak, put an arm around waist to help support her without saying nothin'. They'll put an arm around you to help support themselves and won't... And this is the important part, clobber you.'

The redness slowly faded, but Hotaru's smile didn't, while her mind just shouted 'He likes me, he likes me, he likes me!'.

Normally at this point, small animals would start congregating and birds would start singing, attracted by her aura of unbridled joy, unfortunately, Kasumi was having a picnic with her new friend, Belldandy on the other side of the park, so they were already booked solid. Hotaru just had to settle for the sun shining brightly down upon them and flowers blooming as they walked by.

Ranma, ever sensitive to the slightest change in his environment, thought, 'This ain't half bad, we'll have to do this more often.' And slipped a pair of blues' sunglasses on her and put on a pair himself.

The inquisitive reader may well wonder why, Ranma was carrying two pairs of shades. The answer to this question is simple, Ranma is not carrying two pairs of shades, Ranma is, in fact, carrying 34 pairs of sunglasses, a variety of costumes, and a very confused partridge in a pear tree.

It should come as no surprise to the reader that this came about because of the combination of three things and people:

1. Mousse challenged Ranma (again!).

2. Akane got a bit-part in summer stock.

3. Ranma cast sanity and reason to the wayside to face the challenge.

The final results of the resulting battle were also less than shocking:

1. Ranma won (and learned a bit more about Mousse's style).

2. Akane got fired and spent the rest of the week pelting Ranma with water balloons. (Nabiki had suggested it to reduce the household's repair bill.)

3. The local theater lost most of their costumes and part of their Christmas decorations (As this was Nerima they just shrugged and replaced everything).

Ranma racked his brain for something to talk about. Normally he'd talk about martial arts or the latest Nerima disaster, but Hotaru wasn't from Nerima and the first rule of Nerima was, You don't talk about Nerima. 'What the hell do normal people talk about? She probably ain't into martial arts. I don't think she's into cooking. I'm not into school. Wait, we're going to see Naruto, so I know she's into cartoons.'

"So what's one of your favorite cartoons?" He asked.

"Well, I like Naruto and Skysaber's really fun, but Tenchi's my all-time favorite."

"Can't argue with that. Love Hina's my favorite, but Tenchi's a close second. I can really feel for the guy. He can't choose any of the girls, without hurting the others and since he cares for all of them, there ain't nothin' he can do. It's not that he's a weenie or nothin', he's just in the worst possible situation."

"I think Sasami has it worse. She loves Tenchi and everyone knows it, but he can't take her seriously, cause her body's so young and when she appears as Tsunami, he's awed by her powers and a little afraid of her."

Ranma shrugged "OK, in some ways he really is a big weenie, but all Sasami has to do is wait, because she is a goddess and has a lifespan much longer than the other girls."

Hotaru pouted "But then she'll lose him too, because he won't live that long either."

Ranma shook his head "You forget, Tenchi is Tsunami's chosen knight, so he'll live much longer than the others as well."

Hotaru nodded thoughtfully "Wait a second. Isn't Ryoko, Washu's Knight?"

"Yep," The martial artist replied "but as Emperor of Jurai he's expected to take two wives anyway, so that's not really that big a problem."

"What about Washu?"

Ranma scratched his head. "I'm not really sure if she's serious about Tenchi or just playing with him. It'd be a bit strange to have both of them end up in bed with him. They are mother and daughter, but then the Juraians seem to be the rednecks of the universe anyway, marrying brothers and sisters and other close family members. Heck, their spaceships are made out of wood! I bet their national anthem has banjos in it!"

Hotaru giggled.

"Anyway," Ranma shrugged "with as close-knit as that family seems to be, she could always just ask Washu to borrow him. If she's going to share with her daughter she might as well share with her sister."

Hotaru nodded. "True. They are a bit strange aren't they?" 'I wonder if that's why Chiba-Usa clings to her father so much.'

Ranma shrugged. "I think it's because of the whole long life deal. Having to watch your husband or wife get old and die, while you stay young and healthy would suck. Looking at it that way I would marry Ranko, rather than have to bury a hundred or so wives. I mean the Juraians live for thousands of years."

Hotaru sighed. "And after just a century or two of watching people you care for die of old age, any way to avoid it starts looking better and better."

The two walked on deep in thought.

"Who's Ranko? Do you already have a girlfriend?" Hotaru asked timidly.

Ranma shook his head. "Nah, she's not a girlfriend, more like a sister, though I guess technically she is a fiancée. Pops arranged a bunch of fiancées, including a bunch of girls named Tendo. Since we didn't know each other it was left open for me to choose and I ain't choosed anyone yet. Including Ranko there's six of 'em total."

"You have six fiancées?"

"Nope. Pops also engaged me to several other families, so I got about nine right now."

"I think I can see why you pity Tenchi."

"Yep.The old ghoul says it'll just take some time for the girls to settle down and get used to each other or decide to marry other people. We figure about a decade oughta do it."

"You're going to wait ten years and then marry whoever's left?" The young girl looked shocked at that revelation.

Ranma shrugged. "It's about the only choice I got that won't start a blood feud or five. There are only two, maybe three girls, that I'm sure will wait that long and the others will just have to pass down their obligations to the next generation."

"But aren't three girls still two too many?" She asked, confused.

"If they want me bad enough to wait 10 years, do you really think something like an extra wife or two will stop them?" Ranma grinned ruefully.

"But isn't it illegal?"

"Depends on where you get married. I have several places where the rulers have offered to make it legal for me to marry multiple wives, as long as I promise to live elsewhere."

"Won't they get mad at you for having a girlfriend?"

"Nah, if you were older they might object, but like with Kurumi, they'll probably just decide that as long as I'm with you I'll be safe from the other girls, so they can relax."

"Who's Kurumi?"

"She is the youngest of the Tendo engagements and about a year or so younger than you. She is the only fiancée the girls feel safe with me being around, cause they figure she's too young to drag me off and marry me yet."

"What do you two do together when you go out?" She asked, hoping for tips on where to take him.

"Go to parks and spar, go to carnivals and eat lots of junk foods, go to ice cream parlors and cute the servers into submission, oh and we also go to all-you-can-eat restaurants and make the owners cry."

"That doesn't sound like a very nice thing to do."

Ranma shrugged. "Ain't our fault. They put out a sign saying all-you-can-eat and it's like waving a red flag in front of a bull, we just feel the need to see if they can back up what they're claiming."

Hotaru giggled.

"Which reminds me. If you want to go to an all-you-can-eat place let me know in advance, cause I think we'll have to go to Hokkaido or somethin'. Everywhere else has banned me, Ranko, Kurumi, and pops. Oh, and pandas."

"Why pandas?"

"Well... Do you believe in magic?"

Hotaru gave a tentative nod, hoping Ranma wasn't going to turn out to be another enemy. She just knew he was too cute to be good!

Ranma, completely oblivious to his new girlfriend's worry, continued on with his tale. "It is a tale of tragedy and stupidity... Mostly stupidity. The accursed training grounds of Jusenkyo had over a thousand springs and each had something drown in them. So whenever someone fell in one of the springs they were forever cursed to change into whatever drowned there when splashed with cold water. Hot water will return them to the form they were born in until cold water finds them again."

"You got cursed to turn into a panda?"

Ranma shook his head. "Nope. Any curse you get at Jusenkyo would relate to some flaw you had or some situation you were in. Pops, being fat and lazy at heart, was cursed to turn into a panda and that is why pandas aren't allowed in any all-you-can-eat place anywhere near Tokyo!"

"Did you get cursed?"

"Yep, but I really don't like talking about it. It's kinda embarrassing." Ranma winced, he was really hoping she'd take it better than Akane did, if he could figure out a way to ease her into it.

"Can I guess?" She asked curiously.

"Sure, why not. I think you're the first person who asked, rather than just splash me with somethin'." He was surprised she was taking it so well and not just demanding proof.

"Is it an animal?"

"Nope."

"A plant?"

"Nope. It has something to do with either a fault I had at the time or a situation I was in." 'This is actually kinda fun. She isn't freaked out or nothin' about me being cursed.'

Hotaru scratched her head in thought. "What were you like back then?"

Ranma considered that for a long moment before answering, "I had a huge ego," he puffed out his chest for a moment "of course that's nothin' compared to how big it is now."

Hotaru giggled.

"I thought I was the best martial artist on the face of the earth!" He shrugged "Now I know better, I'm good, but I'm not the best... Yet! Give me a couple of decades and I will be."

Hotaru wondered briefly. 'How good could a normal guy get?'

Ranma rubbed his chin. "I was raised to be a man amongst men and the world's greatest martial artist. I was proud and arrogant. Pops always told me I had to be the best and always called me a weak little girl if I didn't learn somethin' right away."

Hotaru's eyes lit up. "So you probably turn into the exact opposite of a man amongst men!"

"So are you ready to guess?" Ranma asked nervously, sure she had figured it out.

"Yeah!"

"So what's your guess?"

"Michael Jackson!"

THUD

Ranma got up from his facefault and rubbed his nose. " Nope."

"Pewee Herman?" She asked hopefully.

Ranma laughed. "Not a celebrity. Remember, they had to have drowned at the springs."

Hotaru shrugged. "I haven't seen him in any new movies lately."

Ranma shook his head. "True, but I've had this curse for a couple of years."

Hotaru scratched her head. "Tentacled sex fiend?"

Ranma's mouth opened and closed a couple of times before speaking. "Where did you get that idea from?"

"I overheard Minako tell Makoto that her dream boyfriend would turn into a tentacled sex fiend who was hung like a bull and since I already guessed everything I could think of I thought I'd try her dream."

Ranma shook his head. "Nah, but I do know a guy who fits the bill."

"You know a guy who turns into a tentacled sex fiend?"

"Nope. He turns into a minotaur with wings and tentacles, but if you didn't know better you would swear he was a tentacled sex demon. Demon Hunters are always after him."

"Trying to kill him?"

"Not kill, no." Ranma said uncomfortably. "So anyway, back to the guessing." 'Man, I never thought I'd be glad to turn into a girl, but compared to the things she's guessing, I got off lucky!'


	4. Chapter 4

**Falling Silence**

Blushing at her own daring, Hotaru stepped closer to Ranma (he'd let her go when he fell on his face) and slipped an arm around his waist, prompting him to wrap his arm around her again. She smiled and added this moment to her rapidly growing collection of happy memories with his face on them.

If she was still feeling a bit weak and wanted his support he sure wasn't going to say nothin'. This beat Amazon glomps hands down and was a possible second to being hugged by his mom. 'It's a martial artist's duty to help the weak and I bet it's a boyfriend's job to help his girlfriend and if it ain't then it oughta be.' He was quick to excuse his behavior in his own mind, sure that since she wasn't a family member then this was either perverted or unmanly in some way since he was beginning to enjoy it so much.

She was just about to ask what they were chasing his tentacled friend for, if they weren't trying to kill him, when her Senshi communicator vibrated in her pocket. Her brief urge to ignore it was quickly squashed by her loyalty to her friends.

"Um... I have to use the bathroom. Will you wait for me? It may take a little while." She said nervously, hoping it wasn't going to be something that would take a lot of time and ruin her first date, ever. She wasn't sure if she had to trap him for another date or if she could just ask him, since she'd already caught him. Dating was turning out to be a lot more complicated then she'd thought it'd be. 'I wonder if this why they say it's a jungle in the dating world. I never realized traps and moose would be involved.'

"Sure." Ranma replied, letting her go with a little reluctance on both their parts. Friendly physical contact with the opposite sex was a bit rare for both of them, her because of her reputation for being weird or dangerous because of her healing ability and the whole Mistress Nine fiasco and him because any contact with the opposite sex was usually accompanied by either lust or violence.

He leaned against the wall outside the restroom, figuring it wouldn't take too long, as she was the only person he could sense in the immediate area. With as many girls as he knew, he was used to waiting while they did mysterious things, that took almost an hour and half a dozen girls to accomplish, in the bathroom. Not that he'd ever gotten curious enough to check or nothin' and he'd certainly not fled when he'd heard the way girls talk when there were no guys around. 'And they call guys perverts. Sheesh!'

Things were going so well that he was beginning to get nervous. He had made a friend who wasn't looking to marry or kill him. Heck, she wasn't even trying to grope him and even Akane's friends did that when Akane wasn't looking. All she had asked for was the occasional hug and truthfully... sometimes he could use a hug himself.

The semi-familiar tingle of transformation magic and the alteration in the feeling of Hotaru's aura was almost a relief. He'd been waiting for something strange to happen and a magic field strong enough to be felt outside the restroom fit the bill. If it was strange enough he figured he could hit his weirdness quota for the day and he might even get to watch Naruto with Hotaru later without interruption. It was only his ingrained fear of entering a women's restroom that delayed him long enough for the door to open and a girl to pop out.

"Excuse me citizen, the girl in the restroom said her stomach was acting up, so she'd have to postpone going to the movies with you, but that she really wanted to go with you, so she gave me this card with her name and phone number on it, so you could call her later and see about going to a later show. I have to go deal with a youma now, bye!"

Ranma just stared at the strangely dressed girl as she shoved a card into his hand and ran off. If he hadn't been scanning for trouble and familiar with magical transformations, as well as able to feel auras, he might have bought it, but having felt Hotaru change and recognizing the outfit from one of Kasumi's newspaper clippings... 'I'm dating a magic girl?'

Shrugging, he pocketed the card and followed her. He was suppose to protect her from bullies and demons were bullies, right? Invoking the umi-sen-ken he faded from sight. Flitting from shadow to shadow, just in case the Thieves' Cloak was ineffective against magic girls or demons, he followed her.

He wasn't sure what the boyfriend of a magic girl was supposed to do, but he knew one thing for sure, 'If the girls see her transformed like that, they are definitely going to have problems with me dating her. Cute and harmless is fine, but her transformation is a bit like Hinako's and they aren't going to like that at all!'

Taking in her new form, he had to admit she'd filled out nicely. She hadn't filled out like Hinako did, but she'd gained at least five years of growth, hitting beautiful solidly and just missing sexy by a hair. 'Still a bit thin though and she needs some more color. Hmmm...'

Carefully examining her aura, as she stopped to catch her breath against a dumpster, he noticed there was a slight deterioration effect, much like Hinako's, but at a much slower rate and without the ki-pathways needed to absorb ki from an outside source. 'It's like her magic is nibbling away at her ki. That can't be healthy. Hinako can absorb ki from other people to make up for the loss and Happosai got to her while she was young enough to permanently alter her pathways so she'd have a younger form to go into, so she wouldn't lose so much energy in between drains, but Hotaru's too old to do that to. I'm gonna have to feed her ki somehow until I can figure this thing out. Now how the hell do you feed someone ki?'

Ranma's mind hammered away at the problem franticly, as his body slid through the shadows with the ease of long practice.

The Inner Senshi, plus Saturn, gathered in an alley just a couple of blocks from Statue Park.

"I hope this is important, Moon. I had a date with a really cute ice skater. I had to change in the bathroom and slip him a card saying the girl in the restroom had given it to me, because she was feeling sick and he was to call her later." Venus complained, sure that no one else had, had to follow one of the many ridiculous escape plans Mercury had come up with.

Saturn wisely kept silent, knowing better than to mention her new boyfriend in front of the man-hungry inners, especially with the way Venus and Jupiter had begun to intensify their own efforts to catch one recently.

"I'm sure..." Mars began, only to be interrupted.

"You don't understand! He was a sure thing. I'm the senshi of Love, dammit! And if I don't get some soon, then the next dark general or evil prince we run across is going to find out some of the new uses I've devised for my 'love me chain' and you can purify him after I've finished forcing him to have his evil way with me!"

The other senshi leaned away from the ranting blond.

Jupiter started to say something only to have Venus pin her to the wall of the alley with her arms on either side of the startled girl and her face just a hands span away. "Not a word, Cutey! With every day that goes bye that final option we talked about seems more and more attractive and so do you!"

"But we aren't thirty yet!" The brunette protested.

Venus stepped away from her and seemed to regain her bearings. "We turn thirty or thirty days goes bye, it's all the same to me. I'm not feeling that picky at the moment."

Moon opened her mouth to say something, but Venus didn't even look back before interrupting her. "You don't get to say anything, Moon. You have the perfect boyfriend for a magic girl and you won't share!"

The predatory air the ranting blonde put out made Ranma glad he was well hidden. His eyes lit up as she started ranting about the 'perfect boyfriend for a magic girl'. 'Thank, Kami! I was afraid I was going to have to wing it.' Ranma took notes, happy to have at least one problem solved.

* * *

**AN: Once again I am without Beta. Send corrections via PM and remember to review! **

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	5. Chapter 5

**Silent Knight**

"So, what _are_ we here for?" Mercury asked, trying to steer things into a more constructive direction after Venus had finally wound down. It's not that she didn't find Venus' rant entertaining, it was just that hearing about Minako and Makoto's romantic failures reminded her of her own.

"I had a vision!" Mars announced like she was offering the meaning of life, rather then a view of the future that offered as much solid information as staring at a scrambled porn channel. In other words, you got a vague idea about what was going on, but you could easily mistake a knee for a breast and end up screwing yourself trying to imitate it.

Mercury knew fortunetelling was mostly based on interpretation and guesswork rather then hard data and facts, so she usually just tuned Mars and Neptune out when they started talking about visions and what-not and asked them what they thought it all meant when they were done. She found the opinion of the person who had the vision to be more useful then listening to the actual vision itself, because if it was a glimpse of the future then it was filtered through their psyche, so really their opinion was much more accurate then anyone else's interpretation. What this meant was that Mercury's mind tended to wander whenever she had to listen to anyone talk about dreams or prophecies.

'Seventeen and never been tongued. Now that sounds a lot dirtier then I meant it to. Although considering how things have been going, the only way I'm going to get a tongue anywhere, is if I learn Yoga. What I actually meant is that I'm seventeen years old and have yet to have a kiss that involved tongue.' She thought to herself, as Mars outlined the vision she'd received while meditating on her shrine's sacred flame.

'I don't know what's wrong with the guys around here. Makoto may be a bit tall, but she's got the 'talent' that all the guys in school claim they prefer and she's an excellent cook with her own place. She should be beating the boys off with a stick... and that also sounds a lot dirtier then I intended it to. Hmmm, I seem to be doing that a lot lately. I'll have to watch myself or I'll turn into another Minako.'

Mercury's thoughts drifted to the other senshi's dating lives. 'Minako is enthusiastic and perky. Hell, her entire demeanor screams 'I put out' when she's on the prowl and yet she still ends up alone. Sometimes I wonder if she's cursed.'

Moon asked Mars to explain something she'd said about the Knight's aura, drawing Mercury's attention towards the two. 'Moon has Mamoru and eventually Rei. I really hope they get together soon, I could use the money from the betting pool (even if I do have to cut Chiba-Moon in for half) to get that book on Ley Line Travel. A little more peace and quiet at the weekly meetings wouldn't be bad either.'

Venus questioned Rei about what color the Knight's outfit was, which Rei couldn't comment on, as the vision was tinted by the flame's colors.

Mercury considered the Outers' love lives. 'Neptune and Uranus have each other and Pluto is way too smug not to be getting laid on a regular basis. Even Chiba-Usa has a boyfriend, that Pegasus prince. If you consider Minako's threat-promise to Makoto as serious, which I do, then the only two senshi without a possible sex life are Saturn and I. Too bad we're both straight or that situation would solve itself, not to mention I'd still be alone for a couple of years, because although Hotaru is technically fifteen, she still looks and acts about thirteen and lolicon is not one of my interests.'

Forcefully shaking herself out of her mental monologue, Mercury took note of Moon's melancholy expression and quickly ran through everything Mars had been saying while she had been distracted, trying to figure out what Rei had said that had made Usagi look so down. 'Ahh, the knight from the vision is aligned with fire. Well, let's nip that in the bud right now. We can't have Moon leading us into a dangerous situation looking so dispirited or it'll effect us all.'

"Actually the knights were empowered to compliment our powers, not match them, so a knight aligned with fire would either be mine or Neptune's. Mars' Knight would probably have powers similar to mine, dealing with ice or water." Mercury lied glibly. She could always claim the file she'd read on the knights had been corrupted if it did turn out to be Mars' Knight, but the odds are it wasn't, as no knights had been active except Mamoru, when the reincarnation spell was cast by Serenity, besides having a moping Moon lead them into battle was a recipe for disaster.

"Oh," Mars said before shrugging it off as unimportant.

Moon had definitely perked up at the news though, Mercury noted, looking forward to gloating when she won the bet. Normally she wouldn't take pleasure in another's loss, but Haruka had been a pain in the ass lately, talking about lesbian instincts giving her the edge in the pool.

"Anyway, the vision showed the guy dressed a lot like Tuxedo Mask and using roses as weapons, but instead of earth he was affiliated with fire, maybe dragons or birds as well, that bit was unclear. He was fighting on our side against a number of enemies. The sacred flame was unusually clear about the place and time, being Statue Park in about an hour. I'm assuming that's because of his connection to fire, but just in case it's a trap I thought we could arrive early and scout the place out." Mars finished.

"Good idea!" Moon beamed at Mars and took a place at her side.

"Yeah," Minako enthused, having bounced back from her earlier irritation as the possibility of having another male join the group sank in, "it'd be nice to get the jump on the enemy for once, rather then the other way around and you know what they say, forewarned is disarmed."

Mercury didn't bother correcting her, figuring it was close enough that everyone should be able to figure it out on their own.

"Yeah," Moon cheered, "and I prefer an enemy that isn't swinging swords!"

'Almost everyone.' Mercury groaned internally.

"When'd you get a visor?" Makoto asked Saturn, drawing everyone's attention to the the stylish, dark-purple with silver trim, wrap around visor that Saturn was wearing.

Saturn reached up and felt the side of her new accessory, starting a flow of data across her field of view that outlined everyone's physical health and weak points. "I don't know. I didn't even notice it till you mentioned it. It just appeared when I transformed. Where are the other Outers?"

Mercury spoke up, "Mine appeared the same way. Neptune and Uranus are on their way, but I couldn't get ahold of Pluto, so I left a message."

Moon turned to Mercury, "What's the game plan?"

Whipping out her magical laptop, the blue haired senshi that they relied on for group tactics, compiled and searched through all the news articles available about the park online and quickly formed a basic plan. "According to Mars, we have one hour before we meet the mysterious new knight, while in battle with multiple foes. Statue Park is a popular local attraction, as everyone that goes there says that they feel more relaxed and mellow after spending some time there. We have three cases of homeless people slipping into comas after spending the night there. All the data suggests a very low level draining operation is in place. It's much more subtle then we are used to dealing with, so I'll agree with Mars and say that it probably is a trap, but not on the knight's part. The length of time it's been operating suggests that it's one of Jedite's schemes that never got deployed. It's been gathering power for at least two years, based on the hospital reports for the first victim, so expect any youma on site to have a lot of power at their disposal."

Mercury stared at the screen for a moment before speaking again. "I'd suggest splitting up into three pairs. Mars and Moon enter through the east entrance of the park and Venus and Jupiter through the west entrance. Saturn and I will enter through the main entrance and scan for any surprises while you tell everyone to evacuate. That'll limit the number of bystanders and Saturn can protect us with her wall if we trip anything. The park is about twice the size of a soccer field with the entire rear half filled with a maze and a lot of statues. The entrances are all connected to the front of the park, which is mostly just grass and flowers with some trees for shade and some ornamental statues. I can't find any maps of the maze, so try not to get drawn in. It's probably where the trap is."

The assembled senshi quickly agreed and peeled off to do their assigned tasks, leaving two figures hiding in the shadows.

* * *

Ranma saw a flicker of movement following Moon and Mars and slipped after it. He wasn't sure what the whole vision thing was about, but someone lurking in the dark usually meant bad news. As they neared the park the hidden figure slowed down and fell behind just far enough that Ranma was able to catch a good look at him. He was wearing a domino mask and a tuxedo, complete with cane, top hat, and optional cape. 

'That must be the Tuxedo Mask-guy they were talkin' about, Moon's boyfriend. Why's he hanging back?' Ranma watched quietly from the shadow of a tree.

Tuxedo Mask watched Moon shoo people out of the park with a loving smile, before he crouched down placing a hand on the earth beneath him, concentration furrowing his brow. The soft glow that slowly built up around the crouching figure's hand was almost undetectable to Ranma's senses.

'It's got some chi mixed in.' Ranma noted absently, as he searched through the costumes he'd picked up for a similar outfit. He found a domino mask and all the trimmings easily enough, but no tuxedo. Fortunately, Ranma went through so many of his signature outfits a week that he'd learned to sew new ones out of raw materials, so a tuxedo done in raw Chinese silk was easily within his skill range.

He watched Tuxedo Mask's form begin to glow with the power he was drawing up, as Ranma made the accents in purple to go with the black on his Tux. The shadows seemed to cling to the crouched figure, covering up the lighter parts of his outfit so he could hide easily, but Ranma didn't know how to manipulate shadows like that, so he had to make his own outfit as dark as possible, besides it matched Hotaru's this way and made his allegiance clear.

Ranma desperately hoped that dressing a bit like Saturn would keep the ranting blond off him. Finding a small silver bell-earing, shaped like Saturn, he praised the kami and pierced his right ear, carefully wrapping the item in chi to keep it from ringing. He channeled a small burst of energy to the dragon's whisker he used for a hair tie, making his hair grow about a foot longer and gathering it into a ponytail to complete his disguise.

His Pop and some other bald guys had gotten the original whisker from him and made soup with it when they'd finally managed to steal it from him, fortunately it was just after his hair growing curse had worn off, but he'd grown used to having a hair tie that didn't break or burn when he got into a fight, so he'd written Herb asking if he knew of where he could get a replacement whisker. He'd gotten a dark purple one instead of the dark brown one he'd had and he had his suspions that Herb had trimmed it off himself, but it had worked great, so Ranma was satisfied and since it looked so different from the last one, he didn't have to worry about his Pop stealing it.

'The only thing I'm missing is roses.' Ranma thought, before he noticed the rose bush to the left of him. 'Purple roses?! Why the hell would there be purple roses here?' A glint of metal attracted his attention to the plaque at the base of the bush. 'Donated by Kodachi Kuno. Ok, now that I can believe. I'll have to do something nice to her for this.' Ranma thought as he stripped the bush bare. He was used to highly unlikely events taking place around him, although this was pushing things a bit and he was seriously wondering if someone was setting him up for something.

* * *

"I'm getting multiple dark energy contacts from all the statues!" Mercury called out from inside the main entrance of the park in the middle of the picnic area. 

Saturn stood ready, but didn't raise her wall yet. She couldn't afford to waste energy she might need later. Fading out in the middle of combat could get her friends killed and she wasn't about to chance that. The Silence Wall wasn't as draining as healing someone, but it was still draining.

Mercury's fingers danced across the keys, as she quickly interpreted the data. "It's a complex web, weaving all the statues together. If I can find the central point we can take them all out at once, otherwise we're looking at fighting them all till they're drained of energy and from my readings I can tell you now that's not a good thing."

The other senshi stood back to back near their chosen entrances, searching for enemies.

A loud creaking noise from in front of Mercury startled Saturn into raising her wall, just in time to block a flight of stone arrows from a score of cherubs that lined the walls near the entrance to the maze of statues that gave the park it's name. The arrows shattered loudly, spraying shards of rock that were nearly as dangerous as the arrows themselves, but Mercury paid them no mind, trusting Saturn to protect her.

Ranma watched with concern, as bits of Hotaru's chi were eroded away with the flood of magic she was using to project a wall in front of her and Mercury, who was in an almost trance like state as her fingers blurred across the keys of her laptop focussed solely on her goal. Glancing over at Mask, he could see that Moon's boyfriend was waiting for something. The power he had been building up had plateaued at an impressive amount and Ranma knew he wasn't really feeling it all, as all he could really sense was the tiny flecks of chi mixed in it, illuminating it to his senses like seeing sparks, but not the bonfire that generated them.

The fuku clad magic girls launched an impressive array of attacks, blasting many cherubs into gravel before they could reload their bows. Ranma watched keeping one eye on the battle and the other on his girlfriend. Something was pinging his danger sense, but he wasn't sure what and he didn't want to jump in without knowing what was going on or if they didn't need him to.

A second wave of cherubs from further into the park launched their arrows, before Ranma realized what was bugging him. There were two cherubs behind Saturn and Mercury over the main gate, who hadn't done anything and as he watched he could see them very slowly turning towards the two. Slow enough that they didn't catch the eye or register as dangerous and in just the right position to launch a deadly attack from behind the wall.

Saturn saw the danger, just as another wave of arrows were launched from the group the senshi were fighting in front of them. If she dropped the wall to protect against the arrows behind them, they'd get skewered by the ones in front of them. She made her choice and stepped behind Mercury, shielding her with her own body.

Ranma was already in motion when the two cherubs launched their projectiles at Saturn, his form a dark blur against the green grass. 'Dammit, there's not enough time!' He thought to himself, mind racing even faster then his body. The bell in his ear chimed mournfully as Ranma channeled all his ki to his legs as he raced death to its goal. He could see Hotaru's eyes held not a trace of regret or fear as she waited for the end.

He felt strangely proud of her for that.

* * *

**AN:** I decided to be evil and give you a cliffhanger ending. Most people would disagree and say that there's no way I'd kill off Saturn this early in the story so it's not really a cliffhanger. Actually, I could kill her off and have her reincarnated as someone else! Hell, I could have her reincarnated as someone who's alive right now, like Hinako! All I have to do is say that getting sent forward in time to be reincarnated interfered in the natural reincarnation process or that reincarnation isn't normally a sequential event. I can even use the fact that Hinako's problem was similar to Hotaru's, but cured by Happi, as foreshadowing for the whole thing! Hahahaha! I could also shift the entire story into a tale of Ranma tracking down a gateway into the afterlife to bring her back. Saturn in a coma with Ranma offplane, traveling through the kami planes and running into all sorts of her past incarnations, offers a lot of possibilities. All you really have to ask yourself is: Is the author crazy enough to do it? Hehehe. Then again I could just be yanking your chain!

**AN2:** Once again I am without Beta. Send corrections via PM and remember to review!

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	6. Chapter 6

**A Good Day for Destruction**

* * *

Hotaru watched the arrows. Stone really shouldn't fly as well as they did. It was a perfect parabolic arc, starting on top of the main entrance to the front of the park and ending in her chest. 

The Senshi of Destruction marveled at how blue the sky looked. 'Today was a good day.' She thought to herself with a smile, arrows forgotten as she stared into the infinite blue of the sky and remembered what Setsuna-Mama had told her.

It hadn't made sense at the time, but now she could see what she had meant. _"The trick is to live in the present, for the past has faded and the future is just a dream. Time is an illusion. In the end all we have is now."_ It had sounded really ironic coming from the Senshi of Time.

Hotaru held onto that as she felt a sudden pressure against her chest and the deep blue was swallowed up be a velvety black that eclipsed her sight. She reached out and embraced it, willingly.

* * *

Ami's mind floated in a zen trance, as her fingers blurred across the keys of the Mercury computer. Most of her brain ebbed and flowed with the incoming data, as she hammered together a program to make sense of the readings. A small corner, however, was still stuck on thoughts she'd had earlier. 

**Initializing Program**

'Hotaru is a sweet girl and we have a lot in common. Neither of us really fits with our groups, but are loved by them all the same. Our tastes are quite different from theirs as well. Hotaru seems to like guys, at least judging by her reactions to Minako and Makoto's 'girl talk' she does, while Michiru and Haruka are really into girls. I'm not sure what Setsuna likes, but ten thousand years of boredom has probably driven her far off the beaten path in terms of sexual matters.'

Her subconscious quickly engulfed that line of thought for future dream fodder.

**Scanning **

'The other inners seem to be attracted to pretty boys and each other to some extent. Rei and Usagi are really obvious in their attraction to each other, as well as Mamoru and he's not exactly a manly type of man. Minako has declared openly that she intends to have Makoto and Makoto... Her objections seemed a bit off. She sounded more like she was objecting to being put on the spot then the idea itself. After all, she did make the agreement with Minako in the first place.'

**Integrating Data**

The tiny bit of rogue grey matter noted a comforting warmth on her back and realized Saturn was literally standing back to back with her. The pressure doubled a second later before falling away and she noted how good it felt, but sadly even though she felt a great deal of affection and trust for her teammate, she felt not the slightest hint of sexual attraction. 'If only we were gay or at least bi, we could make each other happy, but then again, do we need to have a sexual relationship to make each other happy, or is that just my hormones seeking an outlet? Having a close friend to share hobbies and spend time with would certainly improve things. So, really what I want is a best friend and a way to satisfy my growing libido, before I become a Minako clone. If I make Hotaru my best friend all I need is a boyfriend. What do I want in a guy?'

**Program Complete**

"The central point of the web is in the center of the maze. There's a control module next to it, so don't blast indiscriminately, because if you hit it, all the energy is going to be released at once and I'm not sure what that'll do." Mercury called out, coming out of her programmer's trance.

* * *

Mercury's shout distracted Moon just as she released her tiara. The tiara soared through the air, decapitating a cherub and ricocheting off a light post to nail another one before exploding in a shower of sparks as it lodged in the back of a third, that was taking aim at the bushes. It was a trick shot that Osaka Slim would have been proud of. 

Of course Osaka Slim didn't know that he'd trained Sailor Moon and not just some high school girl that had seen her boyfriend get taken by a pool shark and tried hustling him back well enough that he'd taken her under his wing and taught her everything he knew about pool.

Mamoru still wasn't sure what to think about Usagi's mentor, but he had to admit that watching his little Bunny hustle yakuza and charm them enough to leave them happy about it, was strangely satisfying, not to mention it really eased the drain on his wallet her desert fetish created.

Seeing her fall, but still managing to take down several of the enemy brought a smile to his face. 'That's my Usako, effective, but clumsy.'

Figuring he wouldn't get a better entry cue, he quickly took advantage of it.

Moon scrambled to her knees, before finding herself being lifted to her feet by a strong pair of arms she knew quite well.

"Even the strongest of hearts can stumble, but as long as you have true friends, they'll always help you to your feet once more, knowing you'd do the same for them."

Usagi took a second to bask in the warmth of his embrace and listen to the wistful sighs from the other girls. She could feel her waning strength returning, as she re-entered the fight with renewed vigor, as did the others, drawing strength from their leader's example.

She always felt stronger with her 'knight' by her side. Minako called him 'The ace in Usagi's hole'. No one was sure if she was mangling that phrase, considering the grin she wore.

Although she'd love to have him enter the battle by her side, she knew there was a major tactical advantage (even if she couldn't spell it) to having him skulking in the shadows and making sure the enemy didn't have any surprises waiting in the wings before joining them.

Even Haruka, for all her teasing, admitted he was always there when things got tough, of course suggesting he was like a black cat, always bringing misfortune, hadn't been accepted as favorably, but Haruka had stopped limping within a week. Who knew Luna would get so pissed over what she called 'bigoted speciesist slander'?

Statues shattered like ducks in a shooting gallery, as the girls released a fair amount of energy. A shooting gallery occupied by high schoolers with belt-fed automatic shotguns and poor aiming skills. Collateral damage was rather impressive, and by impressive I mean the Dirty Pair... ahem I mean Neptune and Uranus impressive.

Minako turned around and looked past Moon, her face draining of all color and her smile fading as her lower lip started trembling in a way that promised tears.

Everyone hesitated to turn around for fear of what they might see. After all, if it brought tears to the ever perky Venus' eyes then it had to be bad, right?

* * *

**AN: I decided to be evil and give you another cliffhanger ending. Sorry, I really couldn't resist this one!**

**AN2: Once again I am without Beta. Send corrections via PM and remember to review!**

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	7. Chapter 7

**Bottom of the Cliff **

* * *

****

'Dammit!' Ranma cursed himself mentally. He'd know there wasn't enough time.

The arrows swiftly flew towards their goal, as he sped across the grass.

**20 Feet**

'If only I'd had more time.'

**15 Feet**

'A couple of seconds.'

**10 Feet**

'Who am I kiddin', I'd need at least five minutes and some paper.'

**5 Feet **

'I suck at this sort of thing.'

**Ground Zero**

Zipping in front of Hotaru, close enough that she was pushed backwards, the currently long-haired martial artist pulled two long stemmed purple roses out of weaponspace and wielded them like tonfa, casually smacking both arrows out of the air and twitching his wrists to keep from getting entangled in their suddenly lengthened stems. 'Note to self: Iron Cloth techniques work differently on plants.'

'Man, I don't have a speech ready or a pose. Kuno could have done a better job.' He harshly criticized himself, feeling a bit down at his poor showing.

Slender arms of surprising strength pulled him off balance for a moment, making them both lean on Mercury, as Hotaru, for no reason he could fathom, suddenly embraced him from behind. His bad mood vanished instantly.

He dropped the roses, reached behind himself and grabbed her legs, wrapping them around his waist as he straightened up. It'd be much easier to protect her if she was riding piggy back, right?

With Hotaru safe, he quickly focused on their current situation. The cherubs were reloading their bows and the two roses he'd dropped had already taken root and were beginning to grow into a pair of good size bushes. 'Heh, Pink and Link are gonna be pissed if they find out I know how they make their plants sprout so fast.'

He could easily see how a technique for making cloth into armor could lead to the discovery, by two horticulturally inclined martial artists anyway, of a way to make bushes sprout from seeds in seconds. All it would take is one block with a plant you had planned on attacking with and knowledge of the Iron Cloth technique and boom, instant bush.

Amazons usually disdained the Iron Cloth techniques, preferring to use flesh strengthening ones, but Pink and Link wouldn't have had time to learn the much more involved techniques with all the time needed to learn about their chosen art, making it much more likely that they were the only Amazons to know about it.

'It's been years since they've been by ta challenge Shampoo, so at least I don't gotta worry about them showin' up and trying ta off me ta protect their techniques.'

**Death Valley**

"Why we follow Pig-Boy again?" A brown robed figure asked another brown robed figure.

"Cause he lead us to Shampoo, faster then actually walking straight line to her."

"But he keep yelling about some guy named Ranma."

"Ranma is Shampoo's airen, is cute pigtailed boy we see last time."

"How about we steal her airen?"

"Sugar try that. Got flattened by Shampoo and three outsider girls."

"She give kiss of death?"

"Try many times, get flattened every time. Took week before Sugar give up."

"She give up too easy."

"Girls were fighting each other and didn't notice her. She gave speech about leaving and they still didn't notice her. Bad enough get beat, worse get beat and no one notice doing it, even worse happen over and over."

"So Ranma off limits?"

One of the two figures shrugged. "He good catch, but someone practice art like we do be much better."

**Statue Park **

Ranma ignored the sudden chill that shot down his spine with long practice. His father had probably done something stupid again and deserved another beatdown and even if he didn't, Ranma was sure he still owed his father hundreds of them for the crap he'd put him through in the last couple of years alone, so he'd make sure and give his father a through beating later, just on general principles.

Very aware of the girl clinging to his back, Ranma plucked a pair of roses from the bush in front of him and flung them like throwing spikes. The awkward shaped projectiles hit their targets, spearing right into them and leaving only the flower's head sticking out, but didn't do a whole lot of damage. Piercing weapons did little damage to things without internal organs, he realized. Venus had said Mask used them to good effect, but Ranma obviously didn't know the techniques necessary for the job.

He plucked another two roses and tried to figure out his next move. From the description of Mask's techniques, he was extremely skilled. Anyone talented enough to strike a breaking point with a thrown object, much less a not quite aerodynamic rose, was someone to be respected. Ranma had hoped to see Mask in action and copy some of his techniques (no use reinventing the Horse stance, right?), but hadn't gotten a chance, which was a bit disappointing, because he was sure there was some trick he didn't know about that would make these things more useful.

'Man, it feels good to have Hotaru wrapped around me like this.' He quickly buried that thought, realizing what it sounded like, as he reminded himself that she was much younger then she looked at the moment and made a mental note to give Happosai a thorough beating as well. Sure the shrunken old pervert would probably give as good as he got, but Ranma figured it was exposure to Happosai that caused thoughts like this and Ranma deserved a beating for having these thoughts anyway.

Turning his head he met Hotaru's questioning eyes with a grin and tilted his mask up enough to let her see under it.

Her shocked, but happy smile was everything he could have hoped for.

'Never keep secrets from your girlfriend, they always find out.' He thought to himself, a trifle smugly, but mostly relieved with how things had gone.

It was times like this he was glad he'd paid attention to one of Nabiki's lectures, well part of it anyway.

**-o-o-o-o-o-o-****Flashback****-o-o-o-o-o-o- **

Nabiki had set him down and told him stories about guys in debt to her, because they hid things from their girlfriends and needed help covering things up. She had explained to him, in detail with pie charts, about how much easier things would have been for them, not to mention cheaper, if they'd just come clean in the beginning and how easy it was for lies to spiral out of control and for once, he'd listened.

Rule number one was: _Never keep secrets from your girlfriend, they always find out._

He'd almost asked if any of the rules applied to fiancées as well, but Akane had been watching and he remembered how asking Kasumi about boyfriends was flirting _somehow_, so asking her other sister about anything related to that subject was just asking to get pounded. He'd finally just memorized what she'd said long enough to repeat it back and then promptly forgot most of it.

It wasn't like any of it applied to him; he'd never had a girlfriend and likely never would.

It was the first in a long series of lectures.

Normally he'd have figured, Nabiki spontaneously teaching him anything was part of some scam to separate him from any spare yen he happened to have, but it turned out that Kasumi had asked Nabiki to 'civilize' him and since it was Kasumi asking… They had both started spending at least an hour a day together, filling in some of the gaps in his schooling. The fiancée brigade had all stopped by to make sure Nabiki wasn't pulling a fast one, but seeing Ranma's shock at learning about things he didn't know about, that even Shampoo had been taught in her village… There were no complaints.

**-o-o-o-o-o-****End Flashback****-o-o-o-o-o-**

Ranma watched nervously as another two arrows were launched. It wasn't that they were dangerous, he could knock them out of the air in his sleep, it was just that he'd just discovered that he hated looking bad in front of Hotaru. Sure he'd shown up in the nick of time and saved her, but he didn't have a pose and didn't have a speech. Looking cool and being romantic seemed to be part of the whole Mask deal and he was seriously lacking in both at the moment.

Ranma fed chi to the rose in his right hand, watching it lengthen into a fair approximation of a bullwhip, as the stem tried to reach the earth. He slowed the amount of chi to a trickle, feeling for the line between giving it enough energy to grow and just enough to reinforce it for use as a weapon.

A flick of his wrist snapped both arrows out of the air as he wondered what to do with the other rose, since one was enough at the moment.

'If I was female I'd slip it behind my ear, but that just don't work as a guy.'

Rolling it in his hand he flicked the thorns off and reached up to slip it behind Hotaru's ear.

'Cool and romantic, what do I know about cool and romantic? I'll probably open my mouth and stick my foot in it.'

Saturn's smile and blush went completely unnoticed by the distracted martial artist, who was sure he was going to screw things up.

There was a distant crack from over the main gate, as both the cherubs fell apart, familiar looking purple roses growing in profusion from the remains. 'Heh, guess those two worked after all. Not exactly a fast attack though.'

Seeing no other threats, he turned towards the other magic girls.

Ranma tapped Saturn on the shoulder and pointed to the Silent Wall, to let her know to take it down. There was no point in draining her energy when he could guard them. He could see out of the corner of his eye that she was feeling a bit weak, since she was red faced again.

"The central point of the web is in the center of the maze. There's a control module next to it, so don't blast indiscriminately, because if you hit it, all the energy is going to be released at once and I'm not sure what that'll do." The one who looked a bit like Akane, well a bit more like Akane then any of the other girls he knew anyway, called out, making the blond with the weird hair fall over.

"Even the strongest of hearts can stumble, but as long as you have true friends, they'll always help you to your feet once more, knowing you'd do the same for them." Mask announced while helping Moon, Ranma remembered her name, to her feet.

Ranma had to admit he was impressed. Not by the speech, although managing to say that and keep a straight face was impressive, much less keeping a straight face and saying it in such a way that it sounded believable, at least he figured the girls bought it, considering the way they sighed and smiled.

'I could swear I've heard Kuno say that before. Well, there ain't no way I'm givin' speeches like that. Nabiki said something about fools and remaining silent once. Wish I could remember what it was, but it boils down to, me not talkin' is a good idea sometimes and I think this is one of them times.'

No, Ranma was impressed by the amount of energy Mask released as he spoke. He still couldn't really feel it, but the sparks of chi and the way all the girls seemed to gain strength told him a lot. Mask had just managed to feed them all a second wind.

'Hmmm. The girls are absorbing a bit of chi with all that energy.' Ranma silently flared his aura without letting in fluoresce into the visible range, but letting in cover both him and Hotaru in a warm and comforting embrace that nourished the ego, probably more then was healthy if you asked any Freudian Therapist about it.

The blond girl that scared… err made Ranma a bit nervous, turned and stared directly at him. He suppressed the urge to run, barely, when she suddenly turned pale and started to cry.

'Is she bipolar or what?'

**

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**AN: Once again I am without Beta. Send corrections via PM and remember to review! **

**Hopefully everyone got what I was doing now, other then torturing my readers I mean!**

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	8. Chapter 8

**The sun 'll come out tomorrow... err Today?**

Everyone breathed a sigh of relief upon seeing that nothing bad had happened to Ami or Hotaru, it was just Minako's continuing nervous breakdown from earlier and while they weren't happy about it, as it seemed much more serious than her normal rant, it was much better than losing a couple of friends.

Moon stepped forward to comfort Venus, but Jupiter had already beaten her to it, kneeling by her side.

"There, there. It's ok." Jupiter murmured, cradling Venus to her breast and stroking her hair.

"But... but... alone... never have anyone... cold... eternity... plethora of Mau... crazy cat lady of Crystal Tokyo." The distraught Senshi of Love sobbed.

"Hey, as long as I'm alive you will **NEVER **be alone. Thirty days, remember?"

"But I thought you..." Venus trailed off, a touch of hope and a handful of need filling her watery eyes.

"I was just playing hard to get." Jupiter lied. She liked boys, but she loved her friends and if it took becoming a lesbian to keep Minako from being alone, as Makoto herself had been for most her life, then she'd take lessons from Haruka!

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Haruka blinked and looked over at Michiru. "Why did you just smack me in the back of the head?"

"I have no idea, I just had this uncontrollable urge."

**smack**

"Why did you just smack my ass?" Michiru asked, not slowing her pace as they walked through the mall.

Haruka was about to repeat Michiru's earlier comment back to her, when she developed an evil grin.

The arm around Michiru's waist pulled her through a door marked 'Employees Only' and into one of the empty service corridors, where she was quickly pressed up against the wall by Haruka. "Because you're a naughty girl, who deserves a spanking."

Never let it be said that Haruka Tendo wasn't ready, willing, and able, (not to mention planning and eager) to turn any situation into a chance to have a little fun!

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"Really?" Venus questioned tearfully.

"Yeah, I just didn't want you thinking I was easy or that I was just with you because of desperation. You mean far too much to me for that." Jupiter finished resolutely.

Venus hugged Jupiter tightly. She wasn't quite sure about the rest of what she'd said, but that last bit had a ring of truth to it.

Usagi sniffed at the touching scene. 'Am I really being greedy by not sharing my Mamo-chan?'

Even Rei looked a little teary eyed.

Ami felt a touch of satisfaction, at her hypothesis being proven right, and quite a bit of happiness that the two had found each other.

Meanwhile, both Mamoru and Ranma adjusted their capes a bit, as thoughts of a rather more earthy persuasion ran through their heads, Mamoru because the scene reminded him of a dream he'd had, involving girls with hair both light and dark and Ranma, because he was still confused about what they were talking about and had taken the opportunity to reach back and adjust Saturn a little higher of his back and in doing so discovered that her senshi wear was missing something.

Hotaru felt a bit warmer and colder at the moment. Warmer, because Ranma had, had his hands on her bare butt, even though she was sure in was an accident on his part and colder, because she had just realized that her transformation had kept her wearing the g-string she had been wearing with her civilian outfit, rather than the normal leotard under her skirt and it was a bit drafty.

Venus collected herself, wiping her eyes with her free hand, her other hand still being held firmly by Jupiter. "Thanks. Sorry to break down in the middle of battle like that."

"A wounded heart is no light matter. After all, a wound to the heart is far more deadly than the most toxic of poisons and were you to fall, it would spread to all those who care for you and then none of us would survive." Tuxedo Mask finished, reminding her that all of them cared for her.

Ranma stared in awe at the tuxedo clad hero. 'How the hell does he say all that junk with a straight face and keep it from sounding hokey? He's like the anti-Kuno!'

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Tatewaki Kuno sneezed. "Sorry about that, there appears to be some dust in the air."

The director looked up from his copy of the script. "Don't worry about it, just start again from the top."

Kuno straightened his tie and cleared his throat before reciting his lines. "Foul sorcerer, thy villainy ends here and now! For far too long has thy kind been free to prey upon the weak and innocent of this world. As a champion of right, I will see thee dead!"

"Excellent work, Mr.Kuno. I swear you were born to say these lines. It looks like we have a new lead for, Thor the Thunderer. Once we get the part of Sif goddess of battle cast, we can begin production."

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Mercury cleared her throat, catching everyone's attention. "The throne statue in the center of the maze is the storage module and the sundial next to it is the control module. If the control module breaks it will either deactivate the trap or cause a massive energy surge. I'd advise not hitting it. The storage module however can be safely broken. Without anything to hold the energy it'll disperse rapidly, but harmlessly."

"How do we get to the center of the maze?" Moon asked, happy that the solution to their problem was an easy one and allowed them to use one of their greatest skills, making things go boom.

Everyone looked at the maze and the ten foot wide trail of destruction that they had already blown to the center.

"Never mind." Moon blushed and rubbed the back of her head. "So we just stroll in?"

"It's a trap." Mercury announced, scanning the remains of the hedge maze with her computer. "There are dozens of dark constructs still active, just out of our line of sight, waiting for someone to enter. We have two choices; One, we advance slowly, blowing up anything that gets in our way and hope we have enough energy to force our way to the center or Two, we distract the remaining statues and send our fastest runner in to shatter the throne." Mercury said, her preference for the second option obvious to everyone.

Ranma swung Hotaru around and set her down next to Moon. Cracking his neck he began to loosen up a bit and stretch his muscles, his intention to be the one going in readily apparent.

"Are you sure you're fast enough?" Saturn asked nervously.

Ranma nodded and got ready to sprint as soon as they gave the signal.

Everyone got into position and began their windup. At Saturn's nod, Ranma _**moved**_.

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"Are you sure we have time for this?" Michiru panted as Haruka did her level best to remove the musician's capacity for rational thought.

Haruka's head popped out from beneath Michiru's skirt. "Mars said there was at least an hour until everything was going to happen and that was just ten minutes ago."

Michiru moaned loudly as Haruka went back to work. "Thank the gods! **pant** As long as they're just waiting **pant** for everyone to arrive **pant** we have time. It's not like **pant** they're going to jump the gun..."

The two outers froze for a moment and yelled out in chorus. "Shit!"

Unfortunately, Haruka hadn't moved from her previous position before yelling, so there was a slight delay as the Senshi of Neptune regained her ability to do anything other than grin.

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He was a blur, his cape snapping sharply and his bell jangling energetically as he raced to his target. The statues were far too slow to catch him, as they leapt out and instead caught the trail of destruction in his wake, as various elemental based magical attacks rained down behind him.

Ranma's right hand began to glow as he gathered chi to increase the strength of his blow beyond his normal rock crushing strike.

The four remaining cherubs, in the center of the maze, surrounding the throne and sundial, slowly turned and cocked their bows as he ran.

Ranma's feet left the ground as he leapt the last ten feet, rising the same distance above the throne, his right fist painfully bright to look at.

The cherubs fired their arrows.

Ranma's fist came down like a flaming meteor, just as the arrows slammed into their target.

The sundial cracked and a new sun was born in the center of the park, as all the life energy that was stolen over the last couple of years was released in an instant.

The senshi were blown back by the shockwave, rolling like tumbleweeds to the entrance of the park.

"OW!! Is everyone ok?" Moon, infinitely more practiced at falling then the others, was the first to recover and get back on her feet.

Turning her back on the blinding glow from the center of the park, Moon braced herself against the energy that was still trying to push them away and took a quick count of her friends. "Where's Saturn?"

Mercury rolled over onto her stomach with a groan and shaded her face with her laptop, scanning the ongoing pressure wave. "She's still in there! She's advancing towards the throne!"

Saturn leaned on her glaive, fighting for every inch against the storm of power that had been let loose. Her Silence Wall had become warped and twisted by the storm's fury, leaving a teardrop shaped shield in front of her, but she struggled onward, her carefully horded energy eroding at a frightening rate. 'Ranma..'


	9. Chapter 9

**A Hard Dazed Knight**

"Holy..." Uranus landed a bit awkwardly, as she helped Neptune stand on her own, still a bit wobbly, two feet, and stared.

The Inners had managed to stagger to their feet by the time the two Outers had arrived and were listening to Mercury.

"Her wall isn't going to hold up for much longer against that much power." Mercury muttered, desperately scanning for some way of helping her young friend.

"What, but I thought the Silence Wall was indestructible?" Moon worried.

"Normally I'd say it was, but she's dealing with concentrated life energy and the Silence is diametrically opposed to that."

"Huh?" Several of the Inners questioned.

"It's the opposite of what she has, like fire and water."

"But she heals people." Moon protested.

"Yes, and she heals by using the Silence to draw out all the entropic energy from a person and inject her own life energy to heal the damage. That's why she's so effective against youma created injuries and why healing drains her so much."

"What's going on?" Uranus interrupted, concerned about her missing daughter.

Rei spoke up, overriding the Inners' various explanations. "We were doing a little advanced scouting when the trap activated itself. Venus had a breakdown and Saturn found her knight. He took point to disarm the trap and was at ground zero when it went off. The explosion knocked us all back here except for Saturn. She used her wall to shield herself from the blast and is struggling to reach the center, but is losing energy rapidly. We have no idea what to do next."

"Or why the explosion seems to be limited to the park. It should have destroyed several city blocks." The bluette commented, her eyes never leaving the computer screen.

The Outers squinted at the incandescent fury of the leashed energy, as it screamed for release from the park's confines and decided that asking about the knight wasn't as important as helping their daughter at the moment.

Neptune and Uranus stared into each other's eyes for a moment, communicating something, before Neptune ventured a suggestion. "Wake?"

Uranus nodded. "She won't give up, so I guess we'll have to give her a hand, but we need targeting data or we might do more harm than good."

"She gets that from you, you know. Once she's set on a course of action she won't budge."

"Yeah, and normally I'd be proud of that, but not when she gets into situations like this."

Pluto stepped forward from the shadows, followed by the two mooncats. "I have visors for Neptune and Uranus. They'll give you all the targeting data you need, but I need to borrow Mars for a minute. I'd use Neptune's Aqua mirror, but she'll need the boost of her talisman to cut through the energy field."

The two quickly grabbed and donned the simple silver visors that Pluto offered, each shivering as their power surged through their new wrap around shades and altered them to fit their planetary powers. Without a word the two quickly ran to opposite sides of the park and carefully fired into the park.

"Wait! What do we do?" Moon asked before Pluto could vanish with Mars, worrying about Saturn and wondering if Saturn's knight had survived.

"I'm having a hard time seeing anything clearly in the timegates. The best advice I can give you is to wait and see. Chi bursts usually just knock us down, rather than doing any real damage, as our senshi forms were designed to handle massive amounts of planetary chi and transform it into mana, so Saturn should be just fine. Now if you'll excuse me." Pluto and Mars vanished in a flash of light leaving the senshi to stand around and worry, despite Pluto's comments.

The Silent Knight?" Artemis cocked his head to the side. "I remember something about that."

Listening to Artemis was a welcome distraction from standing around doing nothing, so everyone turned to the white furred feline and listened to him try and recall things he hadn't thought of in eons.

"He was completely devoted to Saturn, wouldn't even speak to anyone but her, that's why they called him, The Silent Knight. Truthfully, no one ever heard him speak to her either, he'd just smile and look at her and she seemed to know whatever he wanted to say just by looking in his eyes." Artemis grinned as he recalled one of his favorite Silver Millennium TV shows, mistaking it for his own memories.

"His greatest skill was stealth. They say he was so skilled that he could be standing right behind you and unless he wanted you to, you'd never know he was there. However his habit of appearing around The Queen without any warning or sound upset her a bit, as she'd turn and find herself walking face first into his chest and had bruised her nose on him more than once. Pluto was ordered to warn the queen about when he was going to appear, but they discovered that the timegates couldn't track him at all." The mooncat chuckled.

"I thought the gates tracked everyone." Moon interjected.

"Nah, they track most people, but they don't track gods, demons, people under certain concealment spells, chaos nexus, little white mice, crows, and a couple of other things I've forgotten. The timegates are powerful, but they aren't all knowing or Pluto could control the future, rather than just guide events. But, back to the story." Artemis cleared his throat and started speaking once more.

"So, The Queen had a small bell, shaped like Saturn, made and asked Saturn to get him to wear it. He was reluctant to wear anything that would interfere with his fighting capabilities, but Saturn smiled at him and he melted. The bell didn't help a whole lot, as he still seemed to popup anywhere he felt like without a sound, but he'd jingle the bell a little, so Serenity wouldn't turn and walk into him anymore." He snickered for a moment.

"Of course that only worked half the time, as she was often distracted by important matters, so she'd walk right into him anyway. Saturn had spoken to him about hurting The Queen, so he'd step backwards real quick, which unfortunately would just make the queen trip as she'd try to stop real fast to avoid hitting something that wasn't there anymore and the next thing you know, The Silent Knight would be on the floor with The Queen on top of him. It happened enough that rumors began to spread. Serenity was embarrassed, Saturn was amused and the knight was flustered, as the phrase 'be there with bells on' was coined for clandestine meetings between lovers."

"My Mom was having an affair with Saturn's knight?!" Moon yelped.

Artemis shrugged. "Not that I know of, but it's possible and was the rumor of the time. The Queen finally ordered Pluto to stand behind her whenever possible, which resulted in the two of them getting tangled up half the time and on several notable occasion, all three of them! Saturn knew her knight was loyal, but found the whole thing hilarious, so she'd pretend that all of them were in a group relationship, which wasn't that uncommon at the time, and scold them all on controlling their hormones in public or hop on the pile and see how long she could keep them all tangled up."

"And The Queen didn't have a problem with this?" Luna asked, scandalized.

"You have to remember that the Senshi of Saturn doesn't appear like the rest of the Senshi. She shows up for maybe a decade and then vanishes again, only to appear when needed, centuries later. If not for the different names you'd assume she was the same girl as the time before. The Senshi of Silence is the only Senshi that doesn't travel in family lines, which makes it really strange that they always look and act the same. At any rate, whenever one appears, Pluto and The Queen simply dote on her, she can do no wrong and is always loyal, and they cry when she vanishes, taking years to recover. So, to answer your question, no, The Queen didn't mind at all."

"He's not my dad, is he?" Moon asked cautiously, as no one had ever mentioned her father from back then to her.

Artemis looked thoughtful for a moment. "I'm not sure, but probably not. Luna?"

Luna shrugged. "I vaguely recall your father as being a knight, but he specialized in chain weapons and doesn't sound like The Silent Knight at all."

"I think you're right. I seem to recall getting thrown out of a few bars with him and he was older than Saturn's knight."

"I don't know whether to feel relieved that Saturn isn't dating my father or disappointed that I won't get to meet him." Usagi finished, scratching her head.

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Saturn struggled forward, gaining another foot as her wall shrank by inches. 'At this rate I'll never reach him!' She worried as she was forcing her way onward, when a familiar looking ball of yellow energy tore through the air a foot in front of her, disrupting the storm for a moment and letting her move forward a lot easier before the chi-storm filled in the hole again.

The scene was repeated, over and over again with alternating shots from Uranus and Neptune tearing through the storm in front of Saturn and she quickly moving forward into the breach, as her once powerful wall shrunk smaller and smaller, draining even more energy from the panting senshi.

Each step she took made the next step even harder to take, but she wasn't about to quit, her date was in the center of this mess and she was going to watch Naruto with him, no matter what forces were aligned against her.

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Ranma would have screamed, but he was far too confused to bother. So what, if his veins felt like they had been replaced with live wires and his skin was currently encircling the park. He was also rather sure that his body wasn't supposed to feel like liquid magma, but needs must as Kasumi drives.

'Or something like that.' He thought to himself with the small portion of his brain that wasn't concentrating on whether he was suppose to be a particle or a wave.

He could feel a foreign body inside himself, but it wasn't as annoying as the two twigs that kept poking him in the side.

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Mars stared around herself curiously. If she didn't know any better she would swear she was at her shrine, but her shrine was never this quiet and there were no windows, the fact that the sacred flame flickered between green and silver wasn't worth a mention compared to that.

"I made it look like your shrine so there'd be fewer distractions from trying to scry in an unfamiliar place." Pluto announced as she knelt down next to the sacred flame and stared at them intently.

Mars nodded and knelt by her side staring at the flame.

5 minutes later...

"It's like trying to watch scrambled porn." Mars complained.

Pluto looked at her quizzically."Of course it is. Looking into the future is always like that. Why do you think your grandfather had you train the way he did. It's standard training for any seer."

"What?! You mean he was serious about that? I thought he was just being a pervert old man."

"He is a pervert, but he's also quite a talented seer among other things. I met him while he was in his prime back in '32 and he was quite a hunk."

"You didn't... I mean you wouldn't... Please tell me you didn't..." Mars stuttered nervously.

"Yes, Rei, I am your grandmother!" Pluto intoned, the shadows dancing as the sacred flame became the only light source in the room, shadowing Pluto's eyes and making her look demonic.

"No, you can't be! Grandfather told me you were dead!"

"It was a joke." Pluto deadpanned as the omnipresent lighting came on again. "I thought you were a bit too tense to get a decent reading, so I wanted to shock you into relaxing a bit. While we are in no rush, we are at the timegates after all, I figured it'd help speed things up."

"Thank god!" Mars muttered as she relaxed and stared at the flames once more.

'So much for a happy family reunion.' Pluto mentally grumbled before doing the same.


	10. Chapter 10

**A Hard Dazed Knight - Part Deux**

Ranma's aura leaked a bit, but considering he was composed mostly of aura at the moment, his lack of control could be forgiven. Sure, he'd managed to keep himself from exploding... too much, but the amount of pure chi that he'd absorbed was more than Saffron and Herb combined had to deal with. Ranma's aura was currently covering a good portion of Japan and part of the nearby ocean, so it might not be as accurate to say his aura was leaking all over Tokyo, so much as saying his aura was engulfing Tokyo.

If he'd known anything about the Earth's chi pathways Ranma could easily have connected to the Earth itself and made himself into a virtual demi-god. Normally it required the sacrifice of a great deal of human lives for someone to initiate the state he was in(1) and that would still leave them at a small fraction of his current power level, but then past a certain point power becomes more dangerous to the wielder then to the target as sailor Saturn could attest, so maybe it's for the best that he didn't know the proper procedure and instead spent his efforts on trying not to become one with Tokyo.

(1)And the necromancer attempting it would require that they all be virgins of course, which really complicates the collection process let me tell you, as there are many ways to prove someone isn't a virgin (including correcting the unfortunate condition), but there really isn't a whole lot of ways to prove one is a virgin, although the invention of pocket protectors and home gaming systems at least provides a reasonable indication of sexual inexperience. The use of virgins as human sacrifices to contract with major powers is not only inefficient, but it's also wrong on several levels, as all deities that would actually entreat with man are far more likely to share their base desires and would much rather be given souls that knew what they were doing, rather than inexperienced virgins that would fumble around and didn't even know about the whole 'breath through your nose' deal. The amount of time spent training concubines in their various duties actually worsens exponentially, as their inexperience tends to re-infect each other due to the slight blending effects of human souls grouped together for sacrifice, on the higher and lower planes with their increase in number and a popular curse among the kami is 'may you receive over seventy virgins' as it guarantees an eternity of teeth scraping and awkwardly positioned bodyparts when you are trying to enjoy yourself.

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Kasumi stopped in the middle of the video store and looked around. She could have sworn Ranma was nearby. Shrugging to herself she continued browsing the anime section for dubs. The American's really made a hash of things when trying to write new scripts to match the lip synch, but they were pretty funny.

'Iori Yagami voiced by Samuel L. Jackson.' The eldest Tendo girl giggled to herself, 'I'll have to show this to Ranma tonight. He'll get such a kick out of it.'

Giving the young girl next to her, who reminded her a lot of her younger sister, a brilliant smile, Kasumi remarked, "I can't believe I never came in here before. It has lots of titles I've never seen and all the newest releases. Thanks again for showing it to me."

Skuld smiled back at her. "Yeah, most people overlook it, but I thought it'd be perfect for you. It's much easier to find once someone has shown you where they hide the entrance."

Kasumi paused and stared at a Ranma ½ Skysaber crossover tape. 'That looks just like Ranma!' Examining it closely she was shocked at how closely it resembled her favorite houseguest's life. 'Has Nabiki sold his life's story? Darn, they only have part one.'

"Ohhh, they have Robotech!" Skuld skipped down the aisle happily, her left arm dumping a massive amount of tapes in her basket.

Kasumi examined the row for more Ranma ½ videos and found one in black with only the title, director's name and an Unrated warning on it. "Oh, My! Directed by Jim Bader." Deciding it was probably just a small budget production she put it in her basket.

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The circus (aka the NWC) had returned to Nerima and scattered back to their (ab)normal lives.

Shampoo was artfully posed on the street corner next to the Neko Hanten. Leaning against the building she had casually brushed her long purple hair over her shoulder and was toying with the end of it, as if checking for split ends.

Akane, not to be outdone, had assumed a similar position on an opposing street corner and lacking the same fullness in her shorter hair decided instead to carefully file her nails with long smooth strokes with the occasional pause to show them off, while pretending to examine them.

Ukyou was posed on the street corner across from Shampoo, seeming to be completely relaxed and had the hair to one up both of them, but instead had polished one of her throwing spatulas to a mirror finish and was using it to 'accidentally' reflect the sun into Shampoo and Akane's eyes, on and off, while she ran a whetstone along the edge.

Kodachi had possession of the final corner across from both Akane and Ukyou and was using it to perform a series of languid stretches.

A large group of Furinkan students had gathered in the street and were watching with rapt gazes.

"I thought Martial Arts Catfighting would be more energetic." A boy muttered, only to be shushed by all nearby.

One of the girls in his class took pity on him. "Most Martial Arts styles were developed by watching the way animals moved and fought. Female cats often show their ranking by the way they pose and groom themselves. It's subtle, but deadly in the social arena, as each pose and movement symbolizes a feminine trait. Shampoo is showing off her bust and hair, while assuming a physical superiority to the others by the casual way she's standing. Akane is sharpening her claws and showing off her legs, trying for a subtle air of strength and menace. Ukyou is sharpening her claws, and really pounding the others with her show of being able to reach them without moving. Demonstrates a brilliant tactical mind on that girl, as well as showing off her beauty by how she's hidden it. Kinda, a casual cute. Kodachi is demonstrating her flexibility and grace, but she really loses points because of the amount of effort she's showing. That move should only be done when the male is present anyway, but then, she is new to the sport."

The boy stared as Akane began slapping herself and cursing. "What does that symbolize?"

The girl focused in on Akane with her binoculars and groaned. "That she's standing on an anthill."

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Mercury stared at her computer screen intently. "Her wall isn't going to last much longer. Venus and Jupiter, she'll be launched out with some force. I need you both to be ready to catch her. Moon, do whatever it is you do to get in a healing state of mind, because this is going to break some bones if we're lucky and do far worse if we aren't."

"Where do we stand?" Venus asked, worrying about getting to the right spot in time when they had a large area to cover.

Mercury quickly came up with the solution. "Middle of the street with Jupiter about fifteen feet back, ready to catch you both. She'll come out hard and fast about eight feet above the ground. As soon as they get back, I'll have Uranus cover the right side bout eight feet back and Neptune will have the left the same, just in case I'm wrong. I'd say no more than three minutes before the wall fails."

Everyone rushed into position while the cats did their best to keep from getting underfoot and ran over to the sidelines with Moon, who was praying for her friend's safety.

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Uranus and Neptune collapsed to their knees, one after another on their respective sides of the park, exhausted from channeling that much power that quickly, their only hope being that they had managed to help their adopted daughter get far enough to make a difference.

Rising as one, their close connection letting them guess what the other would do without planning things out in advance, they both stumbled back towards the other senshi, to see what Mercury could tell them about the current situation and their daughter's condition.

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Saturn passed the wake of Uranus' attack and groaned as she felt her wall finally fade away into nothing. 'It's like trying to hold sand together!' she thought, as her wall finally vanished and the storm's fury leapt at her.

A panicked Saturn wrenched her glaive around in front of her, in a futile effort to block the main thrust of the energy pouring in on her from all sides. While she had the wall up, even just a sliver of it, she had been covered in a teardrop shaped void, but with the wall gone the energy was pouring in from all sides. Closing her eyes she braced herself and felt... nothing?

Cautiously she opened one eye, then another and looked around. The storm still raged and the energy still roared, but it faded to nothing more than a gentle warmth and a light breeze within a few feet of her. A few careful steps forward assured her that the circle of silence would follow her as she started moving towards her goal once more, her flagging energies refreshed and growing stronger by the second.

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Ranma's mind was going in several different directions; one piece was wondering if wearing a bra would be that bad or if maybe the breaking point training would get rid of that nagging lower back pain that always sprang up after fighting while female, after all Shampoo never seemed to have that problem and they were about the same size, another piece was wondering if they served hotdogs at the movie theater, as he had ran across a great stand that served them steamed in the bun with plenty of toppings, another section was wondering how much meat was on a pigeon and if they tasted like chicken.

Telepaths are a rare breed, not because the genes for it are recessive, they aren't, but because each mind is like a snowflake, unique and brilliant, and a telepath looking at someone else's and comparing it to their own mind/snowflake would naturally conclude that everyone, but themselves, is completely insane and incompatible.

'Heh, at least I have a good size rack. Being flatchested would suck, I'd look like that damn tomboy.'

'Ketchup is good and maybe some spicy mustard, skip the onions, add some relish...'

'Would ketchup go well with pigeon or would it need a honey mustard like chicken does?'

At times that view isn't wholly incorrect.

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"Anything?" Pluto asked, taking a break from her own meditations. In her opinion, four hours gate-time was more than enough time to get a reading and if it wasn't, then a new approach was called for.

"Something about horses and butterflies. I'm not really sure what it was about and a scene involving a very large black man with a high pitched voice and red padded gloves knocking out another man with a single blow. Does that help any?" Mars asked, as she stretched and took a sip of tea.

"Indeed it does." Pluto smiled and relaxed a bit. Her own vision was a confusing tangle of naked limbs and grinning faces, that truthfully seemed like it actually was porn, but Mars' reading gave her hope that she knew what was going on and as an added bonus let her know to place a rather large bet on Tyson in his next match.

"Let's do a little word association to make sure. I want you to say the first thing that comes to mind. Ready?"

Mars nodded.

Pluto began, "Pig."

"Boy."

"Boy." Pluto repeated back.

"Girl."

"Tomboy." Pluto leaned forward.

"Uncute." Mars frowned, feeling a bit upset and not sure why.

"K.O."

"Third Round."

Pluto smirked. "That's enough for now. Let's go back and see if we can help the others."

"Wait, why did you need me? I'd think the gate would allow you to see the future far better than any vision of mine."

"The gate's ability to see the future is down and I needed to know why."

"Was I of any help?"

"Oh, yes. You've told me everything I needed to know."

"And are you going to tell me how this all fits together?" Mars ground out, visibly annoyed.

"I'd like to," Pluto said apologetically, "but I can't, it's against the rules. How about I buy you some dango and we hit the manga store to make up for it?"

Mars smiled wistfully as she nodded. She remembered her grandmother taking her out for dango and buying her manga when she was a little girl.

Pluto wrapped an arm around Mars' shoulder and teleported them back down to Earth, completely missing Mars' shocked expression.

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The senshi were spread out like a baseball team waiting for a fly ball.

"Shouldn't she have come out by now," ventured Venus after a minute or so from the pitcher's mound.

Mercury rechecked her readings in the dugout with Moon, Mask, and the cats. "Oh."

"What do you mean 'oh'," Uranus asked tersely from deep right field.

"I mean, Saturn's wall has fallen but she's using the Silence to absorb the energy around her. I didn't know she could do that."

"But I thought the Silence was the exact opposite of the energy she was fighting through and the worst thing to use against it," Moon complained, really hating to find out she hadn't understood what was going on when she thought she had.

"The Silent Wall is the worst thing to use against it, because the wall is up against something that erodes it, but using the Silence directly against it is fine, because she's not trying to keep it out, she's absorbing it, which the Silence is perfect for." Mercury explained.

"Why do you think I wasn't worried about her," Pluto asked, from directly behind Moon, who then stumbled into Mask and managed to grab a hold of Mars, taking all three of them down in a jumble of limbs.

"Ack!!" "Whoa!" "Oopsie!"

Artemis looked down at the three. "You really should save that for your private times together," the mooncat muttered, trying to subtly plant the idea of the three of them together in their heads, since he did have all of next week in the betting pool.

The senshi gathered around but made no move to separate the three on the ground, who found it a bit difficult to get untangled with Moon clumsily pulling the other two back down.

"She'll actually draw strength from the abundant chi, allowing her to draw on the Silence more easily and with less strain," Pluto explained, side stepping a questing hand from the Big pile O'senshi.

"So the Knight of Silence will be OK too," Jupiter asked hopefully.

"What are you talking about, there's no such thing as a Knight of Silence." Pluto said firmly, leaving all the senshi to stare at her in alarm.

**AN: Probably riddled with errors and possibly some termites. PM with any errors found and remember to review please, it encourages me to write more. **


	11. Chapter 11

Knightfall and Heartbreak

The senshi of Destruction strode forward, absorbing everything the storm threw at her and drawing strength from it. Ranma was in there and she wasn't going to let him down! As she neared the center, she had to shield her eyes with a hand. The storm couldn't block her, but the blinding light was another problem.

Carefully approaching the eye of the storm, she could just make out a glowing jewel, hovering in place. Ranma's heart crystal floated, emitting a blinding radiance that was nearly as overwhelming as the storm had been. Ranma's body had been vaporized, leaving his heart crystal to float on a pillar of chi, reigning over the storm's fury.

Hotaru squinted behind her visor. She had no idea what to do or even what she could do about the situation, but she wasn't about to give up and somewhere deep inside… the Silence began to stir.

The Silence had absorbed more chi in the last five minutes then it usually received from a dozen wielders. It couldn't really be said to be sentient, but it had its moments and one of those moments was now, as it reached out and began to manipulate the storm at the unknowing behest of its wielder. For a near perfect engine of obliteration, such as itself, destroying a planet was child's play, literally, while creating something took a bit more effort, fortunately recreating something wasn't all that complicated in the scale of things, but the two large cracks running through Ranma's heart crystal did add a whole new level of difficulty.

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"WHAT," nearly a dozen throats voiced, panicking about little Hotaru risking herself for a Faux Knight.

"There is no such thing as a 'knight of silence'. That was just a character in one of Artemis' favorite shows. He never existed," she explained calmly.

The assorted senshi stumbled over each other's words trying to question Pluto and just generally annoying the hell out of her. Tired of the constant yelling and bickering of the group, she stuck two fingers in her mouth and let out a piercing whistle.

"Enough already, there is no KNIGHT!" Setsuna was a bit out of sorts, the Timegates were acting up, she felt more than a little rejected by Rei's reaction to their being related, and she had the mother of all headaches. She rarely lost her temper, but a rant every now and again helped anyone blow off steam and she felt she was due one.

Slamming her keystaff into the ground, so it would stand on its own, she put her hands on her hips and began lecturing them on the legends of the knights among the commoners and the lack of any actual knights themselves, "I can assure you that any knights you meet are likely to be strangers, because the kingdom didn't empower males. Not because of sexism, but just because we never figured out how to match…"

Being used to Setsuna as the ever calm voice of reason, the senshi were stunned and let her rant. They let Minako rant, so the least they could do was offer Setsuna the same courtesy.

Pluto was just winding up her commentary on the state of the Mercury computer's corrupted files, when the storm… quietly imploded. Facing the senshi, Setsuna didn't notice and silenced anyone's attempts to inform her with a cold glare. She still had half a page of material on the Lunar Cats' faulty memory and she had no intention of starting over because she'd lost her place!

"Luna can't remember squat about the past and that has caused her to become a bit paranoid. Just because someone isn't from the Silver Millennium doesn't mean they are our enemy. There are dozens of fighters who could hold their own in a battle against youma. Hell, there are dozens of enemies that we don't have to face because someone else is taking care of them."

Ranma approached the group, with Hotaru clinging tightly to his side, making him carry her glaive. Setsuna's lecture on 'Why the senshi should start making friends with other heroes' continued on uninterrupted, as Ranma set Hotaru down and they both watched curiously, as she continued on in the same vein for another five minutes.

Quickly getting bored and feeling a bit energetic, Hotaru nudged Ranma and motioned towards the keystaff with her eyes. Ranma reached out and picked up the staff, assuming a position similar to Hotaru, who was standing at attention like she was Setsuna's honor guard. Of course to the watching senshi it looked like he just looked in her eyes and read her mind, adding further proof that he was the 'Knight of Silence'.

Ranma held the key staff in his right hand and felt the same tingle he'd gotten from the staves he'd snagged off of Saffron. Thinking about some of the magical weapons he'd run across, he tried sending a tiny surge of chi into the staff and watched as it melted into a shield, another surge of chi and it became a glaive. Hotaru glanced over and switched weapons with him, letting him experiment with her glaive, which seemed to have a near infinite set of forms as well.

Hotaru stopped him when it took the form of a Roman short sword. She'd always wanted a more compact weapon, she just didn't have the stamina or the height to wield the glaive properly, but a sword like Haruka-Poppa's Space sword would be perfect.

Ranma stuck the Time Glaive back in the ground and they waited patiently for Pluto to run out of steam.

"And what the hell is up with airline food, is it some form of anti-terrorist defense that they developed?"

Hotaru nudged Ranma, silently asking him to get Pluto to stop. Ranma got what she wanted immediately, because both of them were suffering from an excess of energy at the moment and this was quickly getting boring.

Ranma stepped behind Pluto and shook his head, making his bell ring cheerfully.

Setsuna spun around, not expecting someone to be standing right behind her, and took them both down in a tangle of limbs.

Hotaru giggled and yelled, "Dog Pile!" Before jumping on top of the two and attempting to tickle them both into submission.

Luna cleaned a paw and drawled out, "Well… I guess someone's memory isn't as great as she thinks it is. If that's not the Silent Knight, then I'm a pitbull."

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Nabiki and Kasumi stared, eyes glued to the screen.

Kasumi had popped in the, assumed, low budget, Ranma anime and shortly after the opening credits it had headed straight to an 'action' scene. Neither had said a word or moved for the entire length of the tape.

As the closing credits rolled across the screen Nabiki began to notice that Kasumi was putting out an aura.

'That's not a battle aura,' Nabiki noted, with a small corner of her mind, as the majority was replaying scenes in her head and beating herself up over having given Ranma to Akane when Kasumi was, apparently, perfectly willing to share.

It was far too real, despite being a cartoon, to be dismissed as some work of fiction. Both the sisters Tendo could easily see themselves acting in exactly the way they showed on the tape, not to mention it involved some fantasies that neither had ever said aloud much less written down where someone could have read them.

"I'm guessing magic," Nabiki voiced, after clearing her throat a couple of times.

"So umm, you too," the elder sister asked nervously, as she obliquely approached the subject of whether it was drawn from both of them or just from her own personal fantasies.

"Yep," Nabiki didn't even hesitate. She owed Kasumi far too much to leave her exposed like that.

Kasumi let out a relieved sigh. "I wonder if that means… Oh, my!"

Nabiki started snickering and quickly descended into near hysterical laughter that was shortly joined by Kasumi herself, as they both shed the tension they'd built up from watching that… video.

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Akane grumbled and sipped her soda. It was bad enough that she'd lost the match, but she'd gotten a lower score than Kodachi, who had just started the sport today! Hiding out in another ward was a bit childish, but she could really use the break.

The bell over the ice cream parlor's door chimed and in walked Tatewaki Kuno.

'Arrrgghhh! I was looking for a break from the madness,' Akane thought to herself, but then did a quick double take at the way he was dressed.

Kuno was wearing a modest business suit and holding a script in his hand, as he took a seat at one of the booths and waved a server over, ordering a root beer float, before reading his lines aloud and making some minor changes to the wording.

Akane watched, stunned. Kuno was dressed like a normal person and was interested in acting?! This was beyond bizarre. Bracing herself, she stood up and did something she never imagined she would ever willingly do, she slipped into the seat across from him and asked, "Do you mind if I join you?"


	12. Chapter 12

**Saturn Triumphant**

Ranma slipped out of the pile as Saturn pinned the Senshi of Time to the ground by straddling her waist, fingers digging into her sides and reducing the millennia old guardian of time to a young girl who was laughing so hard she was almost peeing herself.

"Uncle! Uncle!" Pluto called out laughing.

Saturn grinned and hopped off Pluto, standing tall (well... tallish). "Saturn has conquered Pluto, who will be the next to face my ultimate attack Tickle Tsunami?"

It was quite obvious to all the Senshi that the normally shy and reserved Hotaru had just been that way because she'd been missing her Knight.

It was quite obvious to Ranma that Hotaru had absorbed a fair amount of his chi somehow and was finally feeling energetic enough to feel playful. Seeing her smile and hearing her laugh, as she chased a wildly dodging Moon, he decided he'd do anything he had to in order to make sure that smile appeared more often.

Mars, Venus, Jupiter, and Tuxedo Mask came over to talk to Ranma as Saturn assaulted Moon.

"So, how did you find out that you were a Knight?" Tuxedo Mask asked curiously.

Before Ranma could even think of answering, Mars interrupted, "And how did you find Saturn before locating the rest of us? I mean, we've been active a lot longer."

"Or did you not become active until you saw her?" Venus broke in.

"What are your intentions towards our daughter?" Neptune asked, she and Uranus having recovered enough to join the group questioning him.

"Where do your loyalties lie?" Luna asked.

Having everyone throw questions at him so quickly that he didn't even have time to think of an answer much less give one, then toss a talking cat on the pile and Ranma decided it was better to be unseen as well as unheard, and quickly faded from sight leaving a group of surprised Senshi and one suspicious Lunar Cat.

Artemis chuckled as Luna began muttering about ways to pin down the new Knight and learn where his loyalties lay. "I told you he doesn't speak to anyone, save possibly Saturn and they seem to just read each other's minds. And Luna, I thought you were satisfied he was the Silent Knight."

"I am, but I want to know where his loyalties are, with Saturn or the Queen. Saturn has had disagreements with the Queen before after all."

Artemis sighed. "The Government of Saturn has had disagreements; Saturn herself has always been loyal. Besides I've told you where his loyalties lie."

"I really wish I had a better memory. Damn cryotubes!" Luna complained. "Ok, so Saturn's loyalties are never in doubt. How does that work with her Knight? Is he loyal to the government of Saturn or just Saturn herself? And what about when there was no Senshi of Saturn, who did he follow then?"

Artemis shrugged, digging deep into his memories. "He's loyal to Hotaru above all else, strip her of her powers and he would follow her still. The government means nothing to him, the girl everything. I have no idea why the Senshi of Saturn only appears for a decade at a time, but the Silent Knight is never around when she isn't. The theory I've always favored is that the Silence itself can only be wielded for a decade at a time, and that's why Saturn isn't always around. Either the power sends her to be reborn, or, her duty done, she vanishes to live the quiet life of your average citizen with the Knight, changing identities to keep anyone from finding her while she's vulnerable."

"And according to Pluto you're just remembering the plot of a television show," Neptune sighed.

"Too many things fit what I remember," Artemis said. "He could have had a show made based on himself to discredit the idea that he exists and the Gates can't track him, so Setsuna wouldn't know. I'd also like to point out that at over 10,000 years of age she may just have forgotten a few things herself."

"I just want to know his intentions," Uranus said

* * *

Ranma had played with the Silent Gladius for a couple of minutes, while watching Saturn and Moon play, before searching for a sheath among the costumes he carried. The best fit he could find was actually a sheath and buckler set from a pirate costume, as the swords with the Roman costumes all appeared to be long swords that were used in several different plays.

"Time out!" Moon called, collapsing at Ranma's feet.

Saturn caught up and looked down at the panting girl in disbelief, panting a bit heavily herself. "I actually tired somebody out?"

Ranma smirked and knelt down, buckling the sheath to Saturn's waist and trying to get it snug but not binding.

"You got me a shield and scabbard?" Hotaru asked, amazed that Ranma had managed to get her accessories for her Senshi outfit while she'd been playing. She absently fitted the small buckler on her arm, with Ranma basically kneeling in front of her with his arms around her, while adjusting the belt on her sheath.

Hotaru brushed his hair to the sides, making him look up and into her eyes, both of them suddenly very aware of the position they were in. She smiled down at him. "Being your girlfriend is just getting better and better."

Ranma blushed so brightly that his aura glowed for a moment from the force of it.

By the time they'd broken eye contact, she was no longer out of breath or tired and the sheath and buckler were a deep purple with silver trim, neither noticed.

* * *

Artemis and the others watched the scene from a distance. "I'd say his intentions are complete and utter worship."

"Wow!" Venus summed up everyone's feelings.

Pluto leaned on her Time Glaive. "Maybe I have forgotten a bit over the millennia, or maybe he has the ability to erase himself from our memories or make us think he was a TV show."

* * *

"How are you so?" Akane tried to find a way of asking her question without being impolite, after they'd spent the last ten minutes making small talk.

"Sane?" Apparently Tatewaki had no such problems.

"Yeah." Akane blushed, embarrassed that she was so obvious about such a delicate subject. Normally she wouldn't care but this Kuno was so different from how he'd been just earlier that day. It was like meeting a whole new person.

"My sister is not well. I know that's fairly obvious, but as you can see I am not like her. I'm not sure how it began, but shortly after my mother's death both my father and sister became what they are. My father vanished after a couple of years, leaving us alone and I was faced with a choice – I had been pretending to be just a little off to fit in with my father and sister. So really, all I could do was either learn to act the part so my sister might have a little company in her madness or act like a normal human being and completely abandon her. I decided that if acting mad and making myself look like the biggest fool in all of Japan was the price required to keep my sister at least a little happy, then it was a price I was quite willing to pay," he explained.

"I don't know what to say," said Akane. "I mean, I've been so mean to you."

"Yes, and be sure to continue doing so," said Tatewaki firmly, the full mustache from his root beer float making Akane snicker.

He grinned as he wiped off his face "Let's face it, the Blue Blunder deserves all the beatings and insults he gets. A tad less groin shots would be appreciated, but for the character to work he has to act in such a way as to deserve them."

Akane blushed. "Heh, sorry. I can hit your inner thigh and make it look like a groin shot easily. I've taken classes in stunts and pratfalls."

"Really? I knew you were interested in the theater, but I had no idea you were interested in modern film. I'm sorry to say I thought you were just interested in the stage as a means of expression and for advanced college credits."

"How can you not want to be on the big screen, to leave behind works that will be talked about by everyone for decades?" Akane grinned. "A bit egotistical or so Nabiki tells me, but it's my dream."

He toasted her with his float, "To egos, the bigger the better."

Akane laughed, "Don't let Ranma hear you say that, his is already big enough."

"And half of it is just an illusion he's putting up himself," Tatewaki said seriously. "I've seen him when he thinks no one is around, well no one conscious anyway. A good portion of his ego is just him playing to the crowd, usually his father or someone else."

"Seriously?!" Akane asked incredulously.

"Yes, he uses his huge ego the way I use the Blue Blunder's stupidity. When something is important, I'll come up with a mind numbingly stupid way to get the right answer and people will believe it's a fluke that their plan failed."

Akane thought about it for a minute. "Well, some of the things he's done for the sake of his ego are pretty out there."

"Exactly! Way too overblown to be real, but it keeps people attacking what appears to be an obvious weakness, letting him manipulate them when they think they're manipulating him. As long as you don't mind looking like an idiot half the time it works well."

"Why are you so open? I mean, we haven't exactly been on the best of terms and here you are telling me everything? Nabiki would at least charge me a couple thousand yen first," she joked.

The Kendoist leaned back and smiled. "I consider myself a fair judge of character and as long as I've known you, you've been a kind person. Well, so long as one avoids mentioning certain subjects, and no I won't name what they are, because that would be mentioning them, So I know my secret is safe with you. Besides, it's nice to know that someone other than me knows what's going on."

Akane blushed. "Thanks, that's about the nicest compliment I've had in the last two years."

"Well it's true," Tatewaki assured her. "I don't suppose you'd be interested in applying for a role in a movie, would you? I've just gotten the role of Thor and the director says we need to find a Sif still. The problem is that finding a martial artist actress to play the part is a bit difficult."

"Why is he searching just for a martial artist actress to fill the role?"

"Well Sif is a battle goddess, so a female martial artist would fill the role much better than some pampered little princess, and by using martial artists in some of the main roles he can save on the special effects budget."

"But what about the quality of the acting?"

Tatewaki grinned. "He said it's far easier to teach a martial artist to act, than it is to teach your average bit player martial arts. He's used the money he's saved on special effects to hire some notable acting coaches, so even if you're acting skills aren't up to snuff, they soon will be. That alone was reason enough for me to take the part."

"Really?" Akane leaned forward, obviously interested.

He grinned. "These people usually won't see you without a couple of years on stage under your belt, so this will allow you to advance from tyro to star, in terms of skill, in short order."

"Where do I need to go?" Akane asked with a smile.

* * *

Saturn's communicator beeped, letting her know there were only fifteen minutes left until the movie started.

"Eeep!"

Ranma was instantly focused on her, worried that something was wrong.

"I left my date in the park and it's only fifteen minutes until the movie starts!" Saturn said, trying to keep Ranma's identity a secret because she didn't know if he wanted the others to know and … it just felt nice to share a secret with him alone.

Ranma swept her up in his arms and practically flew out of the park, wanting to get Hotaru to the movies on time so they'd be able to have their first date go well.

Mercury looked down at her computer. "Damnit!"

Everyone froze and quickly turned to her, waiting to hear what the bad news was.

"The Silent Knight's a Dark General, Hotaru's been repossessed, Artemis has fleas – WHAT?" Venus burst out after a minute waiting with no answer.

Mercury frowned. "None of the above, I just found out there are no openings in any yoga classes anywhere around my house."

"Ok… and on that note, me and Neptune are going to follow our daughter on her date," Uranus announced.

"Going to check and see if she's going out with a guy who'll turn out to be the Silent Knight?" Pluto asked.

"That and I want pictures of my baby's first date!" Uranus said before rushing off.

**AN: Everyone thank godogma who actually types up my stuff so I'll stop procrastinating so much!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Boy in the Hand – Believe It!**

Saturn squealed with joy as Ranma sped along flying over the streets as if he had wings on his ankles. Sure she'd done it herself before but it felt a lot different being carried like she was.

It seemed like no time at all had passed before they arrived at the park and Ranma reluctantly set her down.

Safely hidden in a small clearing surrounded by trees and bushes Saturn de-transformed, making sure to use the twirling naked lightshow version; his reaction just made her grin, she wasn't aware human eyes could get that big.

"Your turn," a blushing Hotaru said.

Ranma was thankful he had a cape to hide parts of himself with, fortunately with Hotaru back in her less developed form he found it a bit easier to regain control of himself.

Taking a deep breath he attempted to imitate her transformation sequence, slowly spinning and using his chi to imitate the light show she put on using careful applications of Happosai's clothes removal technique to remove his Silent Knight outfit piece by piece and replace it with his normal clothes. He'd learned to reverse Happosai's technique long ago, so the only difficulty he'd had was choosing the right poses while spinning.

He landed with a flourish, tucking a purple rose into the buttonhole on his shirt and noticed Hotaru was a bit tired by how red her face was but her smile let him know he'd done an acceptable job.

Wrapping an arm around her to help support her he was surprised when she pulled him into a hug.

"I'm glad you're my knight," Hotaru whispered.

Ranma's response, whatever it would have been would have probably involved a massive blush and a whole lot of stuttering was preempted by a water balloon hitting him in the back of the head.

**0oOo0**

Uranus and Neptune panted as they touched down on the edge of the park. Even at their top speed they'd barely managed to keep him in sight and they'd finally lost him altogether as he'd vanished into the trees.

"Think he was trying to ditch us?" Uranus asked as she panted, trying to catch her breath.

"No, I believe our daughter giggling the faster he went had something to do with that, besides I don't think he knew we were following him," Neptune replied.

Uranus smirked. "He knew, he detoured past several buildings with mirrored windows so he could see who was following him, but I missed the giggling."

"That's ok, I missed the mirrors, ironically enough, but what do we do now?"

"Use the mirror to scry them out?"

"If the Time Gates won't show him, my mirror isn't likely to either." Neptune sighed.

"Call Ami?" Uranus suggested.

"Good idea, hon." Neptune beamed and took out her Sailor Communicator.

"Ami, this is Neptune we lost them …"

**0oOo0**

Mercury nodded and tapped away on her laptop, accessing street names and business addresses. "Since timing was mentioned I can narrow it down quite a bit. Does she prefer anime or horror movies? Ok, then she will be heading to the Juuban Triplex to watch Naruto. Don't mention it, bye!"

Everyone looked at Mercury.

Knowing what incredible gossips her friends were she just sighed and gave in. "Hotaru is taking her date to see the next showing of Naruto at the Juuban Triplex."

"I'd say a Sailor Teleport is in order, wouldn't you?" Sailor Moon said with a grin.

"Who wants to bet her date is the Silent Knight?" Luna asked.

"No bet!" Everyone chorused, knowing how things tended to work out around them.

"I wonder if he talks when he's not in uniform?" Moon asked aloud.

Luna froze for a moment. "That is a very perceptive question," she said.

"Yeah, shocks me too," Artemis admitted, "especially as it never occurred to me."

Ignoring the moon cats, Sailor Moon turned and pressed herself up against Tuxedo Mask. "You'll pay for me and Rei, right?"

Tuxedo Mask nodded dumbly as Moon squealed and hugged him.

"And you'll be my date!" Jupiter declared, taking Venus by the hand who found herself blushing and not knowing why since she herself was usually quite forward.

"Everyone ready?" Luna asked.

"Are we really going to follow her on her date?" Mercury asked.

"I haven't seen the new Naruto movie," Moon said, "besides do you have anything better to do?"

"Good point," she admitted and joined hands with the others just as they all vanished in a burst of light.

**0oOo0**

Hikaru "Voodoo Spike" Gosunkugi grinned and rubbed his hands together; he'd finally gotten his hands on an actual book of magic.

Sure, the shop owner had warned him that it might devour his soul and unleash a plague of death and destruction upon the world – which of course the shop owner had said he didn't believe, but …

Actually… Gos paused as he looked at the trail of dead grass behind him, and the way the people walking their dogs in the park were being drug off by said animals. Including a tiny poodle who was dragging off a 600lb sumo wrestler and decided maybe, just maybe he should bury this book in the closet and buy that book on ley lines he'd seen.

Slapping a dozen demon wards he'd bought from Nabiki on the book he hurried off. The Necronomicon had seemed so promising too.

**0oOo0**

"Still glad I'm your knight?" Ranma asked nervously.

"Of course!" Hotaru declared brightly, surprised by the change but not that surprised after removing her head from between Ranma's breasts.

"This means you'll understand stuff about girls that guys will never get," she assured her remembering one of the reasons her mother had given her for her preference.

Ranma thought about that for a moment. "I'm not sure the curse works like that, although I turn into a girl I've never understood them."

Hotaru giggled. "You sound just like papa, she doesn't get some women either and thinks a lot of the stuff most women worry about is silly."

"Like clothes and makeup and junk?" Ranma asked cautiously as the two came out of the bushes holding hands.

"Exactly," Hotaru agreed. "I use a little makeup and jewelry for when I want to look my best. It makes me feel better about myself," she explained.

"Ah..." Ranma nodded. "It's like warpaint. It's declaring you're good looking and all the lesser females should bow before your beauty."

Hotaru giggled. "I don't know that I'd put it quite that way but I guess that's one way of looking at it."

**0oOo0**

Akane stared at the blank TV, unmoving and pale as a statue.

She'd overhead her two older sisters talking about something perverted, which had been a bit shocking – more for Kasumi's part than Nabiki's and seeing how close … unnaturally close, they seemed to be with one another...

The father's had been drug off by Happosai for training, and her older sisters had said something about eating out for a change and left, leaving Akane home alone.

Akane had immediately started searching for the tape they'd mentioned and had popped it into the VCR … And seen the twisted sexual fantasy they'd animated.

"Okay, my sisters are into some sort of perverted relationship and the only guy they like is Ranma, who I'm engaged to..." Akane froze in place again as she tried to come up with some way out of this.

'_Maybe if Ranma was manly with them he could get them interested in guys again?'_ Akane thought to herself, wondering if her hogging Ranma was responsible for her sisters turning to each other.

Akane banished any trace of jealousy with a force of will that would have shocked anyone who knew her. "Ranma will fix it! He'll be perverted with them both," she declared, "even if it turns into a perverted threeway-thingy he can make it look like they're both just interested in him!"

**0oOo0**

Ranma shivered.

"Are you ok?" Hotaru asked, concerned.

"Yeah, just a feeling of impending doom. Don't worry about it, I get them all the time," Ranma assured her as they entered the lobby of the movie theatre.

"Hey baby!" a broad shouldered teen wearing a leather jacket and shades broke in, "Why not ditch your friend and go on a date with me?"

"I'm already on a date, she's my girlfriend," Ranma said proudly.

"Yeah, well I can cure your rugmunching fixation with just one date," he snorted, "you don't need some skinny little kid, you need a man!"

Ranma almost growled as she saw the hurt look in Hotaru's eyes, stepping forward she let her anger create a red swirling aura that everyone could see and feel. Holding up her right hand she called up her confidence, and deliberately made her normal Moko Takabisha spin.

"Demon!" the punk squealed and fled.

Ranma let her aura drop, her anger gone. "I was trying for something like Naruto's mom," she said, gaining applause from the crowd who thought it was a publicity stunt.

"A Rasengan?" Hotaru asked shocked.

Ranma shook her head. "Nah, but by spinning it I can make it look like one." She slowed down the rotation until it stopped. "You can touch it, it's safe."

Hotaru giggled as she touched the ball, feeling like she was sharing something special with Ranma.

As she withdrew her hand Ranma let the chi ball pop, sending a small wave of life energy through the room.

**0oOo0**

Michiru and Haruka dodged out of the way as a young punk ran out of the theatre.

"I wonder where he was going in such a rush?" Michiru asked rhetorically.

"His mom probably gave him a curfew," Haruka replied, holding the door open for her girlfriend. "Trust me, I know the type."

The pair instantly spotted Hotaru and her date and quickly got into line behind them, trying not to be noticed while Michiru rolled her eyes at how proud Haruka looked when she spotted Hotaru holding hands with a gorgeous redhead.

Unnoticed by the two a forgotten youma egg slowly began to hatch inside the popcorn machine.

**0oOo0**

"Aha! Prepare to face …" the youma formed out of a popcorn machine trailed off as she saw the mass of Sailor Scouts appear in a flash of light in front of her.

"Ahem!" the youma pretended it had something stuck in its throat and tried to play everything off, "Hot and buttered popcorn, get your free hot and buttered popcorn here!"

The Senshi saw they'd appeared in the lobby of the theatre and looked at the youma.

"And don't forget to watch next week's new movie, Theatre of Terror – I promise it's a scream?" the monster tried.

"Nice costume!" Moon said cheerfully while everyone else groaned.

The fact that its torso was made of glass and everyone could see popcorn popping in it seemed to pass Moon by.

"One small, light margarine and salt, please," Moon ordered.

"Uhhh Moon, the readings I'm getting say not only is this a youma but the popcorn removes as many calories as you consume of it," Mercury warned her.

Moon's eyes narrowed. "Theatres are for..." Moon stopped her speech right in the middle of it and looked thoughtful, "are you saying I can have a large soda and lots of candy and if I eat enough of her popcorn I won't gain any weight?"

"I suppose that's one way of looking at it," Mercury allowed.

"One large, extra butter and salt please!" Moon ordered enthusiastically.

The youma quickly delivered Moon's popcorn.

"I'll be back during the intermission for another tub!" Moon promised, dragging a protesting Mars and Mask off.

Venus shrugged. "I'll have the same."

"Ditto," Jupiter added.

"Aren't we supposed to destroy youma?" Luna asked sarcastically.

"Give it a rest, there's no Dark Kingdom to send energy to anymore and she's providing a useful service to society; snacks and weight control," Artemis replied.

Pluto nodded. "He has a point, as long as she's not attacking people we really have nothing to complain about."

"Fine!" Luna sighed. "Large extra butter, no salt, please."

**0oOo0**

"Look! There's Michiru and Haruka," Moon pointed out.

"They're watching Hotaru and … that redheaded girl," Mars finished, surprised as she'd expected a dark haired man.

"Huh, guess it's not the Silent Knight," Luna said.

"Not with breasts like that," Jupiter agreed, watching the two couples and noting how they were sitting before putting her arm around Venus, copying a blushing Ranko.

Venus smiled and leaned against Jupiter, feeling less alone than she'd felt since England and Danburite had cursed her.

Moon poked Mask and pointed at the other couples and Mars until he got a clue and put his arm around her as well, much to Mars' surprise. "We should do this more often," Moon said, smiling at her friend across Mask's chest.

"Uh, yeah," Mars agreed, feeling a bit confused.

Ami looked at all the happy couples surrounding her, or trio's counting Mars, Moon and Mask (hell even the Lunar cats were curled up together) and decided she really did need to find herself a boyfriend.

**0oOo0**

Ranko was enjoying the unfamiliar but welcome sensation of cuddling with someone and not having World War Three start when a bright flash made her blink. "What was that?"

"That's momma and poppa taking pictures," Hotaru said, blushing and embarrassed.

"You think maybe I can get a copy from them later?" Ranko asked hesitantly, not wanting to say the wrong thing but wanting a souvenir of their first date.

Apparently she'd said the right thing because Hotaru beamed at her and kissed her on the cheek, and something happened to Ranma that hadn't happened since she'd gained control of her chi; she lost control of her aura. Ranko's vision took on a pink tint and she couldn't stop smiling.

"You're glowing," Hotaru pointed out and Ranko forced herself to shake off the feeling but couldn't shake the smile.

**0oOo0**

"What the hell was that?" Haruka whispered urgently, glowing aura's being bad news in her experience.

Mercury leaned over the seat in front of her and quickly whispered, "I don't know but the readings match Moon's purifying attack by better than 90%."

"Hotaru kisses her and she radiates positive energy like a bonfire?" Haruka asked rhetorically. ***sniff*** "That's my girl I'm so proud of her!" she exclaimed with tears in her eyes, standing and watching the blushing couple.

Michiru pulled Haruka back down into her seat and whispered, "How can a normal human do that?"

"Who said she's normal?" Mercury whispered. "She's a bonfire of life energy and is fitter than an Olympic athlete. My guess is she's either related to the Silent Knight somehow, since her showing up out of the blue at the same time as him is very unlikely, or she's from a long line of demon hunters, probably the second one."

The movie started and everyone was quickly shushed by the rest of the audience, who didn't mind heroes going to the movies in between battles but still expected them to be quiet like everyone else.

Realizing they'd been spotted as Senshi from the comments of the audience around them Moon whipped out her rod of Moonly might (that's what she called it anyway) and cast a quick disguise spell on herself and her friends.

**0oOo0**

Ranko came out of the theatre with a smile on her face holding hands with her girlfriend and ignoring the group of trench coated, sunglass wearing, and fedora-ed Senshi trying to follow them inconspicuously with Haruka occasionally taking a photo.

Moon paused to get more popcorn from the confused but happy to be alive youma along with the rest of the Senshi while Ranko stopped to ask Hotaru, "So, what do we do now? Most of my dates usually end with a life or death battle long before I get to see a movie."

"Definitely a demon hunter," Mercury whispered to a chorus of nods.

"Now you walk me home," Hotaru said, "and then I give you a good night kiss."

"K-kiss?" Ranko stuttered, her blush extending half a foot from her skin while a giggling Hotaru grabbed her hand and led her home.

**AN: Typing by Godogma who someone wrote to and he suggested I get off my ass and finish the chapter already!**


End file.
